Chapter 700: Dark Elf Dance Night
It was a little late for dinner in a healthy family. It’s easy to forget when you’re in a city where the food and drink industry is thriving, but in the countryside, basically when it gets dark, it’s time for the kids to go to bed. In other words, everyone finishes work at sunset, and as soon as it gets dark, it’s time for dinner. Then the mothers put the kids to bed, and it’s time for the men to have a drink. The human race, who can’t casually use magic, would end up wasting fuel if they stayed up too late. So, after enjoying myself until it was completely dark, I had no choice but to have dinner with a drink. In that case, I would also have to meet up with the Masturbation Brothers.
“I need to go back to the carriage and get the erotic picture scroll”
“Shall I go and get it for you?”
“No, I’ll go myself. Or rather, Emma, you take everyone to the tavern”
The erotic picture scroll was a task I had received from the Masturbation Brothers. And it would be awkward in various ways to have a girl carry the erotic picture scroll.
“There’s a long way to the landing point for the carriage, so I think it would be better if Master led everyone slowly……”
“It’s a matter that touches on a man’s sensitive heart, so please let me do as I please”
Even though she has a certain sense of normality and a sense of shame, Emma is still a little off as a girl. Or perhaps it’s more like a dragon.
The cargo on the wagon was left mostly intact, as there was no need to hurry loading and unloading it. I doubt anyone would steal it……or rather, even if they did, there are dragons everywhere in Polka, so the girls would be able to figure out who the culprit was. By smell or something. But well, they might be a little too relaxed from the sense of security of being back home. If someone gets tempted, it would be bad for both of them.
“Maia!”
After struggling to find the erotic picture scroll in the pitch dark, I call out to Maia. If she’s anywhere near Polka, she should come right away……and then, she came flying over in about a minute.
“Did you call me?”
“I want you to bring the carriage to the garden of the Smithson family house. ……You can eat after you’ve done that”
I wondered where she’d been eating, but she was still holding a huge piece of meat in her hand.
“I’ll eat it right away”
She was going to eat it all in one go, like a dragon, and she was going to strike a pose with the meat in her hand, but I stopped her.
“No need to rush. It’s a waste to eat something good quickly”
“……I’ll eat it quickly”
“That’s right”
I sat with her on the coachman’s seat and fed her while stroking her head. The sight of the girl with the cool looks eating the meat with the bone with all her might was somehow mismatched, and it was a little soothing.
So, I had the carriage taken by Maia’s wings (I also got into the carriage and had her take me along), and then we went to the tavern. Then, lights were set up on the road in front of the tavern and simple tables and chairs were set out, giving it the appearance of an open-air tavern.
“……What, What happened?”
“No, no. You brought that person, didn’t you?”
When I asked the bar’s master, he pointed at Cosmos-san while fixing his dandy moustache. Cosmos-san was wearing a dress with some kind of fluttering, feather-like decoration and was happily chatting with the old men.
“What are you doing, Cosmos-san?”
“I was walking around saying I was a prostitute, but I got in trouble, so I’m greeting people with my entertainment skills♪”
“What entertainment skill?”
“Improvised dance♪”
“Even though Nord-san is here, she’s got a lot of guts again”
“Uhuhu. Because it’ll be fun when that girl comes, right?”
Apparently, she had anticipated that Nord-san would start dancing with a burning sense of rivalry, and had created the flow of the dance night. Even though she was clearly going to be the opening act, she had a lot of guts, or a deep heart.
“And I’m pretty confident too. I’ve had a lot of life experience, you know♪”
Cosmos-san spins around and strikes a pose. The men whistle and clap. Despite the large amount of fabric covering her body, the outfit, which accentuates her chest, brings an accent to her bouncy movements. Cosmos-san, who is small in stature but has a strong presence in her chest, is rather proud of the attention she naturally attracts.
“Now, one more song. Lantz-kun and Goto-kun, please~♪”
“Yes, we’ll take care of it”
“Let’s do it, buddy”
For some reason, in the corner of the Blue Sky Tavern, there is a Goto with a hand-clapping drum in front of him, and Lantz with a bell attached to a short staff. Since nobody here knows Celesta’s dance music, they can’t play it, but these guys, who are among the few Celestians who do know it, don’t really have a deep knowledge of music. For that reason, it seems they are making do with rhythm instruments that don’t have melodies.
『Haa!』
The two of them, Goto, who beats the drum passionately in time with the beat, and Lanz, who shakes his head back and forth while ringing a bell, sound like they’re just playing along to the music (Goto’s drumming is actually in time), but their performance is interesting to watch. Of course, the old men in the audience aren’t looking at the man. Cosmos-san is dancing happily, her wings fluttering. Despite the fact that the floor is made of cobblestones, she does a front somersault, back somersault, cartwheel and handstand, and her rather daring moves are worth watching. And of course, she is wearing a sexy slit skirt, so when she flips it up, the men below get a glimpse of her underwear and get very excited, clenching their fists. No wonder Goto’ passionate performance is ignored.
“Hey, master, got a guitar? I want to play too”
“You can probably find one at the church, but we don’t have one here. This is a bar that doesn’t usually do this kind of thing”
I thought about helping out, but I guess they didn’t have anything like that prepared. While we were doing this, Cosmos-san’s dance came to a sharp end, and there was a round of applause.
“How was it? Did you get excited?”
“I think the slight glimpse was a bit too obvious”
As I gave my opinion with a wry smile, the old men threw bones and fruit skins from the side.
“Hey Andy! What the hell are you saying?!”
“It’s art! What’s this glimpse nonsense? You impure bastard!”
……So in their eyes, this dance is a pure thing like that, is it?
“Well, of course it’s intentional♪”
Cosmos puts her finger to her lips and winks as she removes the ladder. The old men slip and fall. That’s right!
Then, Nord arrives from the hot spring and naturally gets on board with Cosmos’s arrangements.
“Oh, you’re having fun, aren’t you?”
“How about joining us~♪”
“Of course. Even though you’re my sister’s best friend, I can’t just leave you to it in my territory. Lukino, let’s go”
“I can’t do it……I mean, after being done by Andy-kun like that, can you still dance, Nord-neesan?”
When Nord-san invited her, Lukino-san immediately sat down at a table and slumped over. Then the stares of the old men gathered around me.
“Hey, Andy!”
“Who did you get your hands on, you little pervert!”
“Hey, guys! This is a public place, so keep it down!”
I defended myself against the flying food scraps with a plate I found lying around. Nord-san leaned over me and gave the old men a sly look.
“Don’t fight. You can’t dance in a rough place, can you?”
“Ah, yeah”
“No, this is just a greeting”
The old men are weak. I mean, they can’t possibly be so stubborn as to ruin the sexy dance that the dark elf beauty is about to give us, right?
“Well, they were all touching it though♪”
Cosmos-san said it so smoothly that I ended up being exposed to the old men’s murderous glances.
“Master, help!”
“Hinohuno……Cosmos-san, seven new customers? Are you sure you’ve thought about the consequences?”
The master was completely dumbfounded. Even I thought it was a bit much when I was told about it again, but there was nothing I could do. You know how things flow sometimes.
Incidentally, I didn’t get a chance to give them the erotic picture scroll. Because in the end, they were both playing the whole time, and it wasn’t the kind of atmosphere where I could give it to them.
——————————–
The next day, I bumped into Hilda and a stranger on the street.
“Ah, Hilda-san. I didn’t see you after we split up yesterday, but where were you……”
“I was enjoying the hot spring with Swallow-chan☆ Right?”
“I wasn’t in the mood for that”
“……Eh?”
It took me a few seconds to realize that the person next to her was Lady Swallow. Her body had shrunk to about half its size.
“Eeeh!?”
“I don’t know what kind of logic was at work, but she shrank before my eyes, and it was really weird. What is this miraculous spring thing? Could it be a curse or something?”
“I, I mean……seriously?”
Although she is still a little chubbier than the average dark elf, it’s hard to believe that she is the same person, even though they are wearing the same clothes. She was always that fat. Probably well over 100kg.
“That’s Swallow-chan’s natural healthy body. She’s still in the middle of her treatment though”
“I was prepared for a treatment that would physically reduce my weight by vomiting and defecating, but it was really weird to see my body getting thinner and thinner just by soaking in the bath……I wonder if something from me dissolved in the water and came out”
“Losing weight through vomiting and diarrhea may seem natural, but it’s incredibly unhealthy. There’s no way there’s that much content in a human’s digestive system”
“That doesn’t mean you should lose weight like that. That’s not right”
“The effects of the miraculous spring water surpass the latest medical technology. It’s good that I’m going to become healthy faster than I thought”
“All my underwear is useless now……”
Hilda waved to me as she walked down the path to the hot spring with Lady. I reflexively raised my hand and waved her off. I heard Jackie-san’s wife say that the miraculous spring doesn’t make you lose weight, but it does make you healthier. At that rate, I’m surprised.