『…But still, Ruby-chan,…4!』
『What is it…nee-san? 5!』
『I know I’m the one who said it, but…6!』
『…Do you regret it? 7!』
『Yeah…a bit. 8!』
『I’m prepared for it…now that it’s come to this. 9!』
『Right…Doubt!』
Banbarubie 3 is on the screen.
This is the elevator hall.
It’s a slightly wider entrance…marble statues and benches are placed around the place.
It’s a perfect space for a melee while hiding oneself.
No, it’s this kind of hotel, so those places are scattered throughout on purpose.
Sitting down on the marble floor…are the two ladies, Barbie-san and Ruby-san, playing cards.
『It’s no fun playing doubt with only two players because we know what the other party has』
『Right…the other party definitely has the cards you don’t have』
What are those two doing?
『How about playing another game? How about Indian poker?』
Banba-san, the only one standing with her flail, shouts in a crying voice.
『Please let me join too! It’s fun with three people. The infinite possibilities will spread…!』
Barbie-san looks at Banba-san…
『No. Banba-chan is on watch』
『Yeah. You’re ten years too early to join us playing cards』
Ruby-san also dismisses Banba-san from participating the game…
No…what are you girls doing in the middle of a fight?
Or rather, Banba-san’s the only one fighting…I’ve never seen Barbie-san do a decent job in this hotel.
Ruby-san sometimes shoots for aid though
『But still, Nee-san…are you hungry?』
『Yeah. Should we order Kudou pops some pizza?』
『I want some Ramen. What do you want, Banba-chan?』
『Me? Uhm…』
『I think you’re already aware but it’ll be delivered. There’s no sashimi set meals this late at night』
No…Barbie-san
There’s no shop that would deliver to this hotel-turned-battlefield.
『No, I’m on a diet, so I’ll refrain from snacks. I’ve already eaten three lunch boxes from what Kudou-san brought a while ago』
Well, they handed out lunch boxes on the first floor.
『Banba-chan…I would be troubled if you went on a diet!』
Barbie-san glares at her.
『Eh, what is it? I’m managing my physical condition properly. I’m also doing my best in training so my muscles don’t disappear…』
『Nee-san isn’t talking about that!』
Ruby-san scolds Banba-san.
『Err… then what is it?』
Banba-san shows a blank face.
She’s completely puzzled.
『Banba-chan, do you know the law of conservation of mass?』
Barbie-san said.
『Yes, I do know about it』
『Ruby-chan and I have been dieting without Banba-chan knowing…!』
『Eh, is that so?』
『Yes. That’s why…the meat we don’t need is being taken by Banba-chan’s body』
『…What?』
What what?
『Like I said, the law of conservation of mass! The meat decreased from our body must be given to someone else’s body, or else the entropy of the universe will collapse!』
…Was the law of conservation of mass like that?
『Eh…do I have to get fat so Barbie-san can get thin?』
『It’s the opposite! We’ can lose as much weight as you gain!』
『Whaaaat…????!!』
『Therefore, eat as much as you want and get fatter! When someone looks from the outside, we only become slimmer…!』
『Yeah yeah, mass conservation…mass conservation』
Ruby-san laughs at Barbie-san’s absurd theory.
『With that said, Banba-chan will be eating tonkotsu ramen from now on. Eat at least three cups. Become a thicc and garlicy-smelling woman that people can smell coming from a hundred meters away!』
『No way…I don’t want that!』
Then…the elevator’s extension phone rings.
Barbie-san takes the handset.
『Yes? Thank you for calling. This is the preacher of love…Barbie-chan!』
The other side of the call is, of course, Kudou-papa, who’s in the same room as us.
「…Ken-chan Ramen, the new release.」
『My, that’s just perfect. I want to eat some ramen. But, Ken-chan ramen is a bit small』
「The enemy’s heading your way」
Kudou-papa got straight to the point.
『Then, that means that they have started to withdraw?』
「That’s how it is. They’re going with a siege out of desperation…!」
『Roger…I’ll make up and greet them wan!』
Barbie-san throws out the playing cards at hand.
「I think that the ones on there way here would be mainly the Russian thugs anyway…」
『I know. If they’re retreating, then they’re going to use their ace, right?』
「That’s how it is…be careful」
『Who do you think I am? Even if Banba-chan dies, Ruby-chan and I will survive!
『Barbie-saaan, I’m I going to die? Is that decided already…!?』
…Err
「The game’s over…they’re here」
Kudou-papa changes the images on the monitors.
Ahead of the corridor, men in black combat clothes appear, heading towards Barbie-san
There are around 20 people.
They’re terribly disorganized…they’re not maintaining any formation.
Even I can see that they’re not trained in team fighting.
This guys are Viola’s advance withdrawal team?!
『My my. Well then, Barbie-san. You’re going to kick them away…!』
Barbie-san holds onto her prided flail…
『Banba-chan, take a break…』
Barbie-san said.
『Eh, why?』
『It’s not good to not understand the enemy’s ability at first glance…Banba-chan. There’s around 5 professionals mixed in with those amateurs…!』
Ruby-san also takes out her rubber bullet shotgun…
Then she took an automatic rifle which was hidden nearby.
『Ruby-san, that AK is loaded with live ammo?』
Banba-san’s surprised.
『Yes. We’re not going to survive unless we try to kill them seriously…!』
The black enemy troop comes closer to Barbie-san and the two.
『Ruby-chan, take my weapon』
Barbie-san reaches her hand out to Ruby-san while staring at the『enemy』
『Wood or iron?』
Ruby-san opens the golf bag.
Barbie-san…are you going to fight these people with golf equipment?
『Isn’t that obvious?…Black Shaft!』
『Here, Nee-san!』
Ruby-san hands Barbie-san a long black rod.
…Jaki!
In an instant, it stretched out to become the height of Barbie-san’s back…
…It’s a fishing rod.
『Hmm, hmm, hmm…!』
Barbie-san receives and swings around the black fishing rod.
The black rod’s axis stirs up a gale around Barbie-san…
『Good, good…I’m going to fish you out, boys…!』
Ruby-san peels off the cover sticking to her nipples.
『As expected, if I don’t expose my nipples, then I can’t sense the enemy…!』
Making a clicking sound, she checked the rifle again…
『Barbie-san, what should I do…?』
Banba-chan’s confused at the two completely motivated people
『Banba-chan…you can make a report on the film 『lake of illusions』 over there』1
『…Whaaaat?!』
『The theme would be the relationship between the space shuttle and the warring states era』
『That’s impossible! I never understood the meaning of that movie at all…!』
『Then, briefly summarize the plot with the space shuttle, tango, and shampagne and Takeda Shuhei as the axis of the television drama 『I want to be loved for love』』
『That’s impossibleee! That drama’s story development is so messed up!!!!』
『Why is it that Japan’s live action story on space shuttles always turns into 『brainstorming flower garden』…』
Ruby-san said quietly
The enemy’s approach stopped.
All the men in black combat clothes have a pistol.
『Banba-chan…watch out for stray bullets. Think about your own survival for now…!』
…Dadaaaan!!!
The Banbarubie 3 ladies jump into the shadows along with the first gunshot!!
『Barbie-san!』
『Banba-chan, don’t go out!』
『But…!』
『The enemy’s different from before…even if you get close, they won’t stop shooting out of fear of friendly fire. They’re fine with shooting their allies!』
Oh…if Viola’s men are among the Russian people then…
They’ll shoot Barbie-san and others together with the Russians.
『That’s how it is!』
…Zudadadadada!
Ruby-san fires her automatic rifle…!
The enemy takes cover in the shadows in panic
『Here…』
Barbie-san swings her fishing rod!
…Shuba!
Something glitters in the air…?!
『Guwa!』
An enemy combatant hiding behind a big marble statue screams!
『Enjoy Fishing!!!』
Barbie-san…you’re fishing enemies?
『By the way, this isn’t a normal hook. When it pierces, it has a mechanism of squirting out a fast acting and deadly poison…!』
There’s poison in the fishing hook?
『It’s useless to hide! Barbie-san’s 『Queen Bee Dynamite Needle』 will pierce to your heart! Shalala!』
Barbie-san swings her fishing rod!
At the tip of the rod is a thin and robust thread…and the poison needle draws an arc, jumping into the figure of the enemy!
『Akaga…!』
If the needle sticks to anywhere in your body, you’re out.
What a frightening weapon
『……！！』
Barbie-san raises the fishing rod to return the needle…one of the enemy tries to grab the thread.
『…Sorry for you!』
Barbie-san pulls the reel!
Shujujujuju…!
The palm of the man who’s wearing black gloves raised a smoke as it rubs with the thread…!
『Gua!』
The man let go of the thread from the pain of his hand being torn.
『Okay then…!』
That’s when Barbie-san throws over the poisonous needle!
That man got hit by the needle and fell down in agony.
『It’s made of special thread and needles. It won’t be cut easily, and, even if you try to grab it without gloves, your fingers will be cut. Because the needle is a special alloy, it can easily penetrate combat clothes…!』
Ruby-san holds them back with the rifle…
Barbie-san hits them with a needle poison from the blind spot.
The battle continues for a while…
…Zudadadada!
…Bibyun!
…Zuba!
…『Ugaaa!』
『Hey, it’s about time Banba-chan sees it too』
Barbie-san said
『There’s five mixed into the crowed who are moving together』
Those five people are Viola’s subordinates?
『They’re going to come at us soon』
At the moment Barbie-san said…
One of the enemies throws something at Ruby-san
No way…a grenade?!
『They wouldn’t throw hand grenades in an indoor location like this…!』
Despite saying that, Ruby-san jumps into cover with her rifle…!
…Juwa!
It’s smoke grenade.
White gas spews out!
While Ruby-san is thrown off her position…
Several enemies rush towards Barbie-san…!
『You can use this rod like this too!!!』
Barbie-san turns the pole to a whip inside the white smoke and slaps each enemy…!
…Bishu! Bishu!!
…Bibibibishushu!!
The air is being split…!
『The speed of the tip of the rod exceeds the speed of the sound!!』
The masks of the enemy in black combat clothes are broken…each of them are taken down.
『By the way, there’s also poison on the tip of the rod!』
What a poisonous rod…!
『It’s an old saying…sexy ladies are poisonous』
No…I don’t think so,
But, I can see that Barbie-san’s a poisonous woman
『By the way…Hey…it’s only the five of you…come out!』
Barbie-san waves the rod to provoke the enemy
『Barbie-san, even if you say that in Japanese…!』
Banba-san retorts
『My, I wonder…』
Then, Barbie-san said something in fluent English…
『Barbie-san, that’s just cruel, too cruel. It’s so cruel that you’d definitely lose if you’re sued by the US. That’s a horrible taunt…』
Banba-san says from the shadows…
Somehow, she said some slang or something absurd…
…Then
The hidden enemies reveal themselves…
1, 2, 3, 4…5 people
All of them removed their goggles and masks…
All of them are blonde, white men.
「Romeo Montague…」
Nei-san mutters looking at one man’s face.
Viola seems to have sent one of his executive with the withdrawal team.
The remaining four…should be subordinates of Romeo Montague.
Perhaps, the cooperation of the five is perfect.
『My…all of them are blonde men!』
Barbie-san smiles.
『I loved Albert’s 『candy candy』 when I was child you see. Therefore, one day, I told my mom… 『Mama, when I become an adult, I’m going to marry Albert…then, mom said…』
The black fishing rod trembles.
『…『Don’t marry a part-timer, at least marry someone who has regular work』, she said. Mama in heaven, sorry. Your Barbie is doing more inconsistent jobs than a part-timer…!』
『Well, we’re complete outlaws, far from inconsistent jobs』
Ruby-san smiles wryly
Of the five men, two take out knives and three take out guns.
『…It’s a two top three follow-up』
Romeo Montague is of course in the middle of the follow-up group…!
《……GO！》
Romeo Montague ordered and the five men all moved at once…!
The two men with knives go around between Barbie-san and Ruby-san.
Now, Ruby-san can’t shoot to hold them back…!
『Ha!…What a textbook act…!』
- http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0226998/ ↩