Disclaimer: The following blog is a fictional story created based on pic collections available free across the web. The events as depicted in the narrative are 100% made up, and meant to provide tantalizing context to the pictures provided. A picture may say a thousand words, but without a narrative, they don’t give you a story to tell. This blog is an attempt to create that narrative.
Hey Guys. This is Terrance here. If you don’t know me, I’m an original author and occasional translator. I’ve been writing erotic fiction for some time now. I can come up with some pretty crazy scenes, but unfortunately, there is a big difference between having sex and imagining having sex, and after a point, I started to get sick of imagining having sex without getting to experience any of the scenes I write about.
I started recalling back to my youth, remembering all of the porn websites that used to exist. You had the Bangbus, Backroom Facials, Reality Porn, etc… We all knew it was a setup, but we didn’t particularly care. Naturally, it was fun imagining that the pizza guy was getting a blowjob and that perhaps we too, one day, could walk down the street and find a skank who’d fuck us at the smallest provocation.
Oh, and true story here, when I was about seventeen years old, I was working at a pizza place. We got a call from a very drunk woman who was being very flirtatious with the guy on the phone, who happens to be the manager. She asks if he’s cute and if he’d deliver her a sausage pizza *wink* *wink*. The conversation actually ends with her telling the manager to send someone cute and she’ll give him a big “tip”.
Basically, the manager thought the call was fishy, and he wanted to send somebody to her house to see what happens. The choices were between me and a 40-year-old bald guy. Since I was the handsomer of the choices, it seemed like a no-brainer, but at the time I was under the age allowed for making delivery drives. He was this close to making an exception for me when a 20-something off-shift delivery guy came in to pick up his check.
That guy got sent on this delivery… to see what happened. When he returned… his face was completely red as we looked on curiously, demanding the story. As the story goes, he went to deliver the pizza and a 30-year-old woman answered. She declares that she has no money to buy said pizza, but that she wants to give him a blowjob for it. The guy accepts.
So, she drags him into the house, pulls down his pants right at the door, and sucks him off. Apparently, her husband or boyfriend or who knows, pimp, was in the other room watching TV while she sucked him off. He got head, and she got a pizza. My boss actually griped over freeing out a pizza so his employee can get head on company dime. Meanwhile, I was that close! And she was that close to committing a crime ;).
This isn’t really relevant, but that guy had a girlfriend at the time. He worked as a shift manager and due to some inconsistencies, he was fired. When he came in to collect his last check, he actually told us he used to bring his girlfriend into the place late at night and bang her right on the counter. So, if you ever go into a late-night pizza place and the employee comes out of the office tucking in his uniform, make sure he washes his hands.
The reason I told you that story is because I wanted you to understand that even if the reality porn is all a myth, I thought there might be some truth behind it. Basically, I wanted to see if I really could get sex using the supposed techniques in those videos. Some of you probably know I have my routes in science, so frankly, I owed it to science to give it a try and see if I could successfully convince women to fuck me.
Thus… the Xperiment is born. I’ll go out into the world, trying various techniques to see if I’m able to successfully get with women. Of course, the one stipulation is that I need photo evidence of the event. After all, the internet decrees pics or it didn’t happen. Thus, with a camera in one hand and my dick in the other, I decided to partake on this journey, and create a blog about my experiences for you, my readers.
For my first night out the town, I really didn’t want to break any barriers here. There were so many different techniques. Do I try a girl off the internet? Do I use Tinder? Do I make a fake job application or casting gig and try to seduce a woman there? Fake a porn? Just hand a woman money and see if she folds? Of course, some of these techniques start leaking into the realm of legally questionable, and I can’t say I’m the most suave guy around.
With my self esteem low and my dick hard, I decided to go for the lowest common denominator. Don’t look at me poorly, I swear I’m going to up my game in the future, but I wanted a sure-fire thing. There’s nothing more sure-fire than paying a woman for sex. Yes… I ended up hiring a prostitute. I called her from an ad she had online. She said I had to pick her up, and so I picked her up at an intersection about five miles from my house.
Guys, I live in the Great Plains…. it’s all farm country.
It was raining a bit, so I think she was glad to get out of it. I was really worried she’d freak out about the camera, but she was actually pretty cool with it. She wanted the money first though, which she made abundantly clear. As to how much, well, since we’re talking for science here, it was $100 (Thanks Patreon!). While she wasn’t quite as hot as her post photo, I think she’s okay looking, it’s up to you to decide whether you’d fuck her. I mean… I fucked her.
At this point, I was really nervous. I’d never been in a car with a prostitute before, and honestly she was a little plainer looking than I expected. Aren’t they supposed to be wearing fetish gear and gobs of makeup? Well, whatever, she wasn’t a hobgoblin, so I was happy. As I looked for a place to park, I thought I needed to talk with her. I was trying to use all of my game to flirt and win her over. You can probably see in the picture above, but she was probably thinking “what the fuck, will this guy just get it over with already?”
So, we parked, and I stared awkwardly at her for a minute. She gave me a polite smile, and looked like she was ready to open the door and flee with the money. Not sure how to proceed, I ended up saying the first thing that popped into my mind.
“Can I see your tits?”
Yeah, not the smoothest line. I’m ah… going to need to work on that. However, to my excitement and surprise, she actually did lift her shirt. She was wearing a pink bra, which she quickly popped under her tits. When I whipped out the camera, she even posed for me!
I think she was more comfortable now that we were getting down to what she came for.
By the way, those are big areolas, right? I mean, half her boob is that giant pink thing. I barely got the whole thing in my mouth. By the way, that mark under her boob is actually a hickey. As soon as she popped out her breasts, I grabbed it and started sucking. I only managed to get the photo after I played with her boobs for like five minutes. They were wet and I actually grabbed a towel and started drying her tit. It was at that point I noticed the mark. I apparently sucked too hard and she was actually giving me a pissy look.
I guess you shouldn’t damage the merchandise, lol.
Well, enough of that. Rather than make things worse, I awkwardly gestured at my junk, and she actually started unbuttoning my pants. I think at this point she was just getting annoyed with the camera.
Oh, sorry, am I wasting the hour of your time I bought?
So, finally, she had my penis out and… and nothing… I thought she was going to suck it for a while, but she immediately asked me for a condom, her fingers barely on my cock.
“S-suck it?” I asked awkwardly.
“That’s another hole. Another $50 for a second hole.”
I was like seriously, WTF? Well, I wasn’t going to pay $50 for a few seconds of foreplay, so I just pulled out the condom and put it on. I had to put my seat back all the way and getting things adjusted took some time. She couldn’t get it in with her pants still on. She actually needed to get back into her seat and completely pull her pants off before swinging her leg over again. I just let her do all the work at this point, I mean, fuck, it’s paid for, right? I leaned back in my seat and let her do everything.
Hey, what’s important is I’m wearing protection
Was her pussy magical? Naw… I’m not sure if she shaves at all and her pussy had a little redness from walking around a lot. She got it in after a few tries and then she started riding me. I grabbed her tits while she rode me. Her pussy was tight, and it got wet after a little while. Her bouncing up and down on me was fun for a bit.
I mated with a woman, inform the men.
Eventually though, I started getting over excited by it. I wanted to be in a more dominating position. I ended up lying her down on the passenger seat. I started plowing into her laying across both seats. It was actually a bit uncomfortable, the seat-belt hit my knee and I think the center space was digging into her ass. I regretted the position immediately.
You try getting a good picture from that angle.
Fortunately, we didn’t go much longer because I actually ended up cumming. It was one of those weak cums where you’re left not very satisfied. If the sex had been hot, it’d be one of those things that rolled into more and hotter sex, but unfortunately, I’m not a masochist and discomfort from the position ruined it.
I should have just let her keep riding me. I’m pretty sure she didn’t have an orgasm at all. She just crinkled her eye brows and breathed harder for a few minutes. She liked to keep her eyes closed like she was pretending I was someone else. I didn’t even get a moan out of her. I didn’t need to impress her, but I was hoping for at least some ego stroke. However, once she felt me swelling inside her, I could tell in her eyes she was looking to finish this up.
I guess that’s the problem with hookers. They say $100 for an hour, but what they mean is $100 until you cum. If you cum in 10 minutes, then they won’t hesitate to leave. Try to make them stay for a second round, and it gets weird real quick.
The look of a woman ready to jump out of my car.
So, she pulled out her cellphone and looked at it for a bit and then told me to drop her off somewhere ten minutes away from us. I guess, she was using me for free transport. She got out and I took off. Was it a bad experience? No, I got sex. She wasn’t completely unfortunate looking and the whole thing was easy and only took less than an hour. However, this is the XXXperiment, so let’s attach some real data to this to make it all scientific.
Technique: Hiring a Prostitute Online
Difficulty: 2/10
Cost: $100 – Costly
Success: Yes
Female Beauty: 4/10
Quality of Sex: 4/10
Extras (Anal, BJ, etc…): No
Overall Thoughts: I don’t really want to dump $100 every time I wanted to have sex. I also have no thoughts of using her again. Maybe if she shaved and cleaned up a bit more and made an honest attempt to look excited to be there. I feel like if you make a living fucking, you should at least learn how to lie. Your body ain’t so hot that just spreading your legs justifies the cost. On to the next!