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“We could have gotten through that much faster if I wasn’t looking for pitfalls.” Diamond complained, even though the only reason they finished was because Misty ignored all caution and slid right on by.
The truth was that I had wanted there to be pitfalls, but the ice hallways didn’t support pitfalls. The building mechanics for a dungeon core could be surprisingly limited, the rules making some exploits impossible.
Had I smothered some pitfalls in slime innards, that hallway would have been impossible to pass, but unfortunately, I could only put them in normal hallways. It was the same for lowered roofs. You couldn’t make a pitfall that couldn’t be theoretically overcome with a quick jump. Had I switched hallways mysteriously in the middle of the ice, it’d have been far too obvious. In the end, I could only do what I did.
“It’s a puzzle room,” Diamond spoke as she looked around the new floor they entered.
“A puzzle room? On a new dungeon?” Misty asked.
Diamond shook her head, glaring at the walls like she was trying to glare at me. “This dungeon is weird. Most new dungeons just populate with monsters and simple traps. If I knew it was like this, I might not have agreed to help you.”
I watched them as they entered my fourth floor. This was the last bit of protection I had. I wished I had spent more time working on it. It was just three puzzle rooms, and once they got through them, they could fight my boss. My boss wasn’t anything special. It was the lowest boss creature available, the only one I could afford, called the rat king, which was just a rat the size of a St. Bernard. It seemed terrifying at the time, but now it felt painfully inadequate.
“How do we do this puzzle?” Diamond asked, looking around impatiently.
In the middle of the room was a small altar with an arched top. In the center of that ach was a single small bone sticking out of it. It looked like a humerus except that it was a bit smaller than a human, about nine inches tall, and perhaps three inches wide at the head with a two-inch diameter along the length and the rest of it embedded into the altar.
It belonged to one of my now-deceased goblins. Once she killed it, I was wondering if there was a way to resurrect the goblins and save money. Looking through my options, there was an assortment of spells and enchantments I could use. Some targeted items, some targeted rooms, and some targeted mobs. Some would last permanently, and some only lasted for a limited time. I eventually found what I was looking for among curses.
It was possible to bring the goblin back as a zombie, but it cost four times as much as the zombie itself, and not only would it be as weak as a goblin, but it’d be slow and even stupider. There was no reason to zombify a goblin. There was also the option to reanimate the skeleton, but I had no clue what its stats would be and it would be even more expensive than the zombie.
That’s when I found the cheapest option available, reanimate bone. I wasn’t sure how it worked, but I tried it out, and the bone was brought back as the monster named Evil Bone. It didn’t move. It sort of just laid there. I had no clue why it was called a monster. The spell had caused it to become smooth like glass and dark like obsidian. Not wanting to waste it, I made it a part of this dungeon puzzle.
“There is a clue, I found writing!” Misty grew excited.
“Eh?”
That had been the most annoying part of this puzzle room. Puzzles seemed to have very strict policies. The puzzle had to be solvable. I couldn’t just create something obscure that they’d never figured out. There had to be enough clues. In the end, the puzzle wouldn’t let me place it until I put a riddle down. Even then, I had to rewrite it three times before it was considered acceptable.
“Before one can go, another must cum. Place your sacrifice on the altar. Every journey starts rough and cold, but as long as you persevere, friction becomes pleasure, and dryness becomes warm and moist.”
“Was this written by a child?” Diamond made a face. “Look, it even misspelled come!”
I slapped my forehead. I didn’t want it to be that obvious, but the room wouldn’t let me otherwise. I might as well have said you need to bone the bone. Yet, these girls still seemed to be confused.
“It has something to do with the bone on the altar,” Misty explained. “We have to make some kind of sacrificial offer. What does a bone want?”
“I’m not sacrificing any of my weapons are armor, and certainly not my life,” Diamond responded angrily.
“Yeah, but these treasure rooms had a trick to them, right? The thing needed to pass the puzzle room must be in the puzzle room. No keys on a random monster down the hallway. We should have everything we need in this room.”
“Maybe we need to pull it.” Diamond ran over and grabbed it with both hands, starting to yank on it, then let go with a cry.
“What happened?”
“I-it suddenly twitched!”
I had been startled. I had been curious and so I entered the bone. In other words, I was the evil bone. When I first made this puzzle, I was just hoping to disgust any C-rank adventurer. Since I knew I couldn’t defeat them by strength, I hoped that by humiliating them, I thought I could discourage them from continuing. That was also the point of the previous floor. I hadn’t thought about how effective the cold would be. My only goal had been to make them quit out of embarrassment. It would have almost worked too if Misty hadn’t had that moment of inspiration.
However, as I played with the evil bone, I was naturally curious and entered it. Once I was part of the bone, I could feel what the bone felt. With some practice, I found I was able to shift my body. With a goblin, it was pretty simple. It had the same body parts I did, and so the senses all matched. I had wondered how my senses would work if I took over a monster like a worm, or let’s be honest, I had been hoping for a tentacle monster, although I had yet to see one in the store at 6000 points.
Either way, since I had the bone, I tested and found it could only account for some of my senses. Grabbing it could be made to feel like grabbing my arm. With practice, I was able to switch it to feel like a leg or a finger. I could assign the sense to any given bone. I didn’t have any of these body parts, so this with simply a perceived tactile sense based on my previous human existence.
That’s why it was so malleable. It was obvious where this research would head. I managed to move the feeling to my nonexistent penis. Thus, to proceed into the dungeon, a woman needed to take a ride. I had spent a great deal of personal effort sanding down the stone altar so that it had the arched base of a saddle. I may have been a lazy guy, but I had spent countless hours working on my tabletop figurines and could be considered quite industrious when it came to arts and crafts. With the bone standing up, it was hard not to see a sex toy. That’s why these girl’s confusion was causing me some embarrassment.
When she wrapped her fingers around it and pulled so hard, it caught me off guard. I hadn’t expected the bone to react in the same way my bone would react. The two girls were now staring at my bone with such intensity that if I wasn’t a solid object, it might have shrunken like a scared turtle.
“My monster detector says it’s an evil bone.” She had some kind of magic stone she was passing over it.
“An evil bone? According to Friedman’s Glossary of Monsters, evil bones come from defeated monsters. A bone absorbs the emotions and feelings of the monster it came from and then transmits those feelings to others nearby. It is known to spread anger, greed, or resentment. Entire parties have been destroyed by them unknowingly camping near an evil bone.”
“Are you trying to brag that you’re more learned than me? Huh? I don’t… feel anger though.” Diamond looked at the bone awkwardly. “I feel, kind of hot…”
“I thought that it was just because we came from that ice tunnel, but I’m also feeling very warm.”
“Is that how it works?” I mumbled.
I hadn’t known anything about the evil bone, but now I realized the treasure I had. I was in the goblin as it died, so the feelings the evil bone had were my feelings. At the time of my death, I felt desperation, but I also felt horny. Right before I died, I had looked at her ass and had been slightly distracted, which was part of the reason she killed me so cleanly. With the goblin skull crushed, there wasn’t even any time to feel anything else. In other words, if there was any feeling the evil bone would transmit, it’d be desperation and horniness!
“Friction… moist…” Misty looked to be in deep thought. “I think I figured it out.”
“What is it?” Diamond asked, her cheeks pink.
“This bone was once alive, but now it is cold and dead. The riddle says that if we want to solve this riddle, we have to inject the bone with life.”
If I had a mouth and I had been drinking coffee, I’d have spit that coffee out. How could the riddle have brought her to that? Just fuck my stick already!
“You mean, we have to bleed on it?” Diamond asked, looking unhappy.
Misty shook her head. “No, the riddle says warm and moist. I think we have to use friction to warm it up.”
“Gross… you do it.”
“O-okay…” Misty agreed, getting on her knees.
Looking at the bone hesitantly for a moment, she reached out and grabbed it in her hand. She then started to move her hand up and down the shaft. I could only let out a moan as I felt her hand. Of course, I was just a bone, so no words came out. Otherwise, she definitely would have been startled and stopped. Diamond watched with her nose wrinkled and a vicious expression on her face. Somehow, that made it a little hotter for me.
At first, I found Diamond to be pretty uninteresting. I liked a woman with curves, and she had none. Furthermore, her face was always twisted with a cruel, ugly look. With her short, tomboyish appearance, there was nothing about her that aroused my interest. Yet, seeing her grossed-out face, there was something in me that stirred. It was a desire to debase her. Although Misty was trying to kill me, she had a kindness to her. It was in the way she held herself and spoke. I felt slightly bad about some of the things I had done to her. I felt like I wouldn’t feel any regret no matter how I played with Diamond, and that turned me on a bit more.
Misty continued to move her hand up and down my shaft, but her actions were rough and it started to chaff a bit. Did she forget my riddle? She wasn’t using any moisture at all! I was also a little disappointed. I legitimately hadn’t thought about using a hand. In that respect, a mouth would work too. I supposed it was too much to think that these girls would just pull out their pussy and mount a completely strange bone. I had read too many hentai.
Diamond let out an annoyed sound. “The door still hasn’t opened. You’re doing it wrong.”
“It’s too big. It’s hard to warm.” Misty panted as she stroked.
Diamond let out a sigh. “Fine, I’ll help.”
She got on her knees on the other side and used both hands. Suddenly, I had three hands stroking me. This experience was completely different than when I was a goblin. Other than the fact it was dry, there was also more of it. The goblin penis had been barely an inch long, and even when I stuck it in Misty’s mouth, it felt like being in some wet cavern. These girls were squeezing me as they stroked, and each stroke had far more distance to go. if I wasn’t chaffed, I’d already have orgasmed.
“Wait… I think we’re missing something.” Misty panted as she continued to stroke with her whole arm, her tits bouncing as she did.
“You say that now?” Diamond was also breathing hard, both girls using their strength to move their hands almost like a blur.
“Moisture!” Misty declared. “It needs to be wet!”
“Geh… where is my bag, I have a water skin.”
“No…” Misty shook her head. “Water will make the friction worse… I know! Spit on it.”
“What? No!”
“It’s the only way, I know it.” Pew!
“Ugh, fine… whatever.” Pew.
Both girls started to spit on my bone, and it quickly became slick and covered in liquid, their hands moving much smoother now. Seeing them spitting on me, and especially Diamond’s look of disdain, was far too much.
“Fuck…. I’m cumming!”
My bone shook as I spasmed, and then liquid shot out of the bone. The girls cried out, not expecting a fountain of white stuff to erupt out of the bone. Both girls ended up getting splashed in the face. When they fell back, the last few spurts ran down my spent bone. That felt amazing. I never thought my first-hand job would be from two girls at once, servicing my nine-inch bone.
“What is this stuff?” Diamond pulled the white fluid off her face.
Misty scooped some off her face, sniffed it, and then licked it. Her eyes lit up excitedly.
“It’s mana essence!”
“Mana essence? Seriously?” Diamond seemed stunned, and then excited, quickly pulling a vial from her storage ring and collecting the stuff dripping down the cock. “Finally, some treasure! I was beginning to think the dungeon analyzer lied. Why would it appear here?”
“This must be the award for passing this puzzle,” Misty explained. “Evil bones convert emotion into mana. It must have reached the limit that can be stored in the bone, and the remaining exploded out in an eruption.”
Don’t look at me, I had no clue this was going to happen. It turned out my horny pleasure had filled the bone, and its mana had exploded out. I didn’t even know that was a thing until it happened. I was worried it would cost my dungeon points, but they were still rising steadily, so I didn’t worry about it. What I did worry about was that they had reached the second puzzle. Only one to go, and then I was doomed.
“The door is open,” Misty announced once Diamond finished scooping up every drop of essence, including the stuff on Misty’s chest.
The pair entered the next room.
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