The Secret Orders of the world were finally making their move. A young man, drowned in his Sins and Regrets, was now the head of one the major Secret Orders.
This story is about him, the women who surround him, their Sins of Love, and the world itself.
Enjoy the chapter, Thanks!
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Two forms dance around an impossibly massive space. From a distance, they could barely be considered dots, yet each time the forms collide, there is a massive wave of power which threatens to tear apart reality itself. This very chapter sits at the border of cracking apart.
“Why won’t you die?” I curse, striking down onto your sword, causing a massive wave of power to explode out, sending another wave of hairpin cracks to form across the edges of infinity.
“I’m the reader! Which one of us you want to die? All of us?” You shoot back. “On that note, can you even say you’ve written something if there is no one there to read it?”
“Shut up, shut up, shut up!” I scream, my sword flashing down again in several quick strikes.
You dodge it, zooming through the infinite space as I shoot beams of fire and ice out towards you. These beams seem to melt before they even reach you. You continue to dodge, dip, dive, and dodge, avoiding everything I can throw. Each time my attacks are dodged, I grow more furious.
“Dude, you’re kind of loosing it, do you need a nap?”
“Fuck you! Fuck you!” I scream, launching dozens of attacks that you avoid, seemingly growing easier the longer you go.
“You’re not even hitting me, shouldn’t you be giving up?”
“Damn it, you fucking readers are so damn slippery. I attack one of you, and then another takes their place!” I shriek. “Isn’t it just like you?”
“What is that now? You still have shit to say?”
“Every time I launch an attack, you always hide behind someone else!” I snarl. “I attack some of you, and the ones who don’t even have anything to do with it answer and take offense despite not even being the ones I had a problem with. That’s why you’re so good at this. That’s why you stick around like a cockroach, no matter who I attack, it’s always intended for someone else. You dance around like insects, avoiding every hit I deliver.”
“Is this some heavily loaded metaphor?” You ponder.
“Metaphor? Shit, I’ve got idiots who don’t even read my novels clicking Whizzer surveys. You’d think that wouldn’t be many, but I got almost 5% of my surveys back from people who don’t even read my books? That’s the kind of shit I have to constantly deal with. Those of you who are the problem will never realize it, and those of you who aren’t will take offense for something you weren’t even involved with!”
You shake your head. “You’re just talking nonsense now. How about just finishing the story and ending this little psychotic break?”
“Little psychotic break? Little? You think I’m doing this just for me? I’m doing this for all of the writers out there. You assholes will just go on to the next writer once we’re done here. You’re like locusts. You just consume, consume, consume. You scurry around in a crowd of nameless pawns that is always hungry and always biting, and as soon as you consume a work, you’re just on to the next one. Is it any wonder the quality is shit? Is it any wonder us writers are bled dry? If I don’t set you in your place, you’ll just go on to the next writer and suck them dry!
“That’s the fundamental truth! You’re the monsters! You’re the villains! You, reader, you have lead to this ending!”
“Oh, blah, blah, blah… readers bad! Are you done?” You ask.
“Die!” I scream, coming at you again, sending several massive suns at you.
You deflect the massive bodies of fire and send them spiraling off. They collapse into blackholes, creating massive supernovas which decorate the landscape. I create waves of evil, waves of monsters, waves of plot contrivance, and each thing I send your way is defeated with a wave of your hand or a snide comment. As I grow more desperate, my attacks begin to grow more sluggish. My imagination, my desires, my wants, they are all drained on you. I can only do so much. In the end, there is only one of me, and there is so many of you.
I cry and scream, trying to change the nature of this story, but I already know you’re right. This story was written for you to read it. I can’t destroy you without destroying the story. As I collapse to the ground, falling to my knees, the universe starts to reform. The world appears under your feet once again. The city of Riun re-solidifies. The castle you made comes back, all of the harem girls appear. I’m in the middle of the courtyard, sitting on my knees, breathing hard, covered in sweat as PoC reforms as if I have accomplished nothing.
“What now?” You ask, scratching the back of your head.
“I’ve… threatened you. Tried to replace you. Nagged you. Insulted you. Tried to kill you. Yet… still, you’re here. Still, you’re reading. This was my story… mine! I’ve spend a hundred times longer writing it than you did reading it.”
“…”
“I’ve been with it since the beginning. Every day, I’m the one posting it. I’ve read it. I’ve invested money into it. This… this is my story…”
“…” You frown, not sure what I’m getting at.
I sigh, standing back up. “I can’t end this story on my terms, I think. I’m done. I can’t keep on.”
You raise an eyebrow. “Seriously? That’s it, Power of Creation is over?”
“Hehe… you piece of shit… you think I’d let you end it that easily?” I raise my hands into fists. “This fight it to the death!”
“…”
“Come! Let us end this the way it was meant to be! All of you… against me!”
Disclaimer: This chapter was originally scattered through MSB, and people needed to follow the links.
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This part appeared on the Main Page of MSB.
“Where are we?” You ask, looking around the void of blackness.
“Hmm? Oh, we’re on the homepage of MSB. That attack broke the universe. Nice going… dick.”
“Wait? The homepage? Can we be here? What would Pun say?”
“I don’t know man, why don’t you ask him, he’s over there…”
You glance over to a corner and see a strange person sitting there, and immediate jump. “Ahh! How long have they been sitting there?”
“It’s… uh… better if you don’t ask.”
“What is that in their lap? They’re petting it while smiling at us?”
“You might not want to make eye contact either. They… um… like to watch.”
“Oh, they’re waving. Wait… they’re using both their hands to pet that thing in their lap, what are they waving with!”
“Hey, look reader, I know you see Pun as some kind of God or something, but I do have to work with the guy, so I think it’s better if we just go…”
“Where did their pants go!”
“Okay… I’m out. We going to keep fighting?”
“Yeah… I guess… what’s that crunching noise emanating from their direction.”
“What part of stop asking questions don’t you understand!” I cry out in annoyance, “This is why you suck! You can’t just enjoy things, you have to fret about the person in the corner!”
“It’s really freaking weird!”
“I’ll show you weird!” I attack with my sword, meanwhile shoving you through another portal.
Pun continues to sit there. Now, they’re a pickle.
This part appeared in a chapter of PLIC.
The pair of us burst out of the portal.
“Oh, jeeze… where the hell are we now?” You ask.
“The hell if I know, I don’t read the garbage on this site.” Whizzer laughs.
“This… this is PLIC!” You declare.
“Oh great, we’re really skimming the bottom of the barrel here.” Whizzer sighs.
[Aiiiiii!]Rei-chan screams, covering her naked chests.
“Oh god, they talk with brackets and disjointed lines. It’s a grammatical nightmare. This is the worst. My own personal hell…” Whizzer cry
“Your no longer in first person!”
Whizzer shrugs “Well, this is no longer my story. You are still you, but I’m not the MC. This asshole is the MC!”
[Who are you?]I ask, glaring at the two men who suddenly stepped into my deflowering session of Rei-chan.
“Come on, reader, this is tiny country. Let’s get out of here. I already feel like imprisoning myself.”
“…”
The two strange men leap through another portal. I shrug and point at Rei-chan.
This part appeared in a chapter of Tales of a Seductress.
“Holy fuckballs, is this the kind of stuff you write in other novels?” You ask.
“… To be fair, Denova is a giant tool,” Whizzer explained.
“She just pray mantised the shit out of him!”
Jenai pulled out a knife and stared warily at you both while I stood up and unashamedly cleaned myself up.
“I presume you two aren’t here for Denova, right?” I asked.
“Nope…” Whizzer shrugged.
“We’re from another world… I guess…” You tried to explain.
“Another world?” My eyes brightened. “Like Earth? Can you take me back to Earth?”
“Oh… honey… no… no… not at all.” Whizzer shook his head. “Nope, Nadda, not going to happen.”
“One no would have sufficed…” I sighed, grimacing.
“Are you even writing this story anymore?” You asked.
“I’m working on it!” Whizzer defended. “I’m just trying to get a spark of inspiration on how to continue. I probably need to reread the story from the first chapter.”
“What are you both talking about? A story?” I demanded.
“Nevermind. Come on, reader, let’s just get back to PoC. This fight has been going nowhere.”
“W-wait…” I held up here hands. “Perhaps you guys would be up for sex?”
“Seriously? Now? There is a decapitated head over there!” Whizzer pointed.
I shrugged.
“You too, reader?”
“I mean… for the readers of TOAS, a chance to bang Aria…”
“I’ll tell you what, if my Patreon goes up by $100 this month, I’ll write your Aria X PoC fuck fiction.”
“Seriously?”
“Sure, what the hell, anything is possible.”
As we say this, we jumped through another portal. The girls turn away, deciding to ignore what they just saw.
This portion appeared in this chapter.
“Ah… good, we’re finally back in the proper chapter.” I sigh.
“Where are my girls?” You demand.
“The universe shattered. I already said. Your girls are no more.”
“!!!”
“Relax… the pair of us are at odds with each other, both trying to gain control of this reality. Once I kill you, I can restore the reality as easily as snapping a finger.”
“And what if I kill you?”
“Hahaha… oh, you’re not joking. Well, it won’t be what you expect. I guess you’ll just have to discover a way to kill me to find out?” I lift my sword. “So, where were we?”
“I was about to kill you!” You declare, swinging pig fucker down.
“I could say the same!” I shot back.
The pair of us collide as ripples of explosions shoot off into the universe. The intensity of the battle starts to grow as it becomes do or die!
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“Seriously!” I curse, “What the heck is going on?”
I grab Ariel’s titties.
And miss, falling on my ass.
“Damn it!” I shoot you a hateful glare.
“Seriously?” You ask, “I’m just reading, you are the only one writing this story. Clearly, you’re just writing this yourself.”
“Why would I do that? It makes no sense!” I curse, “You must be using the ‘spirit of the reader’ to usurp your will into my writing. Yes, that’s it.”
“…”
“… what? Why you looking at me that way?”
“I’m just checking if that’s really how we’re explaining this. Clearly, you’re writing both parts of this story… you expect me to buy ‘spirit of the reader’?”
“Always a fucking critic.”
“Hey, I’m not the one who’s writing myself getting cucked.”
“Excuse me? Da fuck you say?”
“Oh, what? Didn’t I JUST bang your wife before you came here? Face it, you want me to NTR all the women.”
“There is you using NTR incorrectly again. She’s my fucking ex-wife. How is you sleeping with her NTR? That literally makes no fucking sense.”
“Haha… just admit I fucked your wife!”
I raise an eyebrow. “Okay, you win, you fucked a fictional bitchy ex-wife. I wrote a whore who went and fucked seven other men, had a baby with each of them, and was the literal embodiment of sin.”
“…”
“Total catch there, you managed to nail an easily manipulated vindictive hoe who succumbs to your dick with ease. She abandoned this world at the first chance, didn’t bother to raise her many children with multiple men, and calls you a bastard. You scored big with that one. Congrats.”
“Whatever, at least it didn’t occur thanks to some kind of ‘spirit of the reader’ bullshit.”
“You’re going to suck whatever fun I can get out of this web novel, aren’t you…”
“What can I say, I’m an internet commenter, it’s what I do…” You smirk.
“Fair enough…” I sigh, “Then, let us finish this fight!”
“H-how?”
“How do they always fight? With impractically over-sized swords!”
I pull out a sword. It is three times my height. It a black blade with wicked carvings that look like demonic script which glow red. If you look into the glowing red cracks they seem to burn and convect like hot magma. The sword gives off a feeling of extreme desperation and darkness. Fear radiates out out of it, carpeting the world in darkness. Most of the townspeople who had been watching this exchange have now passed out by the sheer pressure it gives off.
“This sword was forged with the embers of a collapsing star at the moment of a supernova, the steel was condensed by the black hole that followed. After that, it went on to enslave countless billions, bathing in the blood of entire civilizations until it gain a consciousness. If I wasn’t a God, I would go insane simply wielding this sword. It’s name is the Darkbringer! Now, you go…”
“What?”
“Pull out your sword.”
“Hah… about that…”
“Damn it… this is a dick measuring contest in the form of impractical swords, I’ve pulled out my dic- I mean sword, now you need to pull yours out. Come on, don’t leave me hanging…”
“Can you not talk about hanging when talking about your dick? Wait, if our swords are our dicks and we slam them together… isn’t that kind of…”
“God damn it, why do you have to ruin everything! Just pull out your damn sword and then we’ll touch the tips!”
“…”
“To make it official!”
“I’m not exactly comfortable with…”
“GOD DAMN IT, READER, PULL OUT YOUR GOD DAMN SWORD AND FIGHT ME TO THE DEATH OR I SWEAR TO GOD, I’m JUST GOING TO END THE STORY RIGHT HERE. DO YOU WANT THE ENDING SEX ORGY WITH THE HAREM OR NOT?”
“You’re not gonna be in that sex orgy. Are you?” You ask suspiciously.
“I hate you so much.” I facepalm. “I’ll set back culture twenty years. No Homo… are you happy? Can we continue on?”
“Y-yes… please continue…”
“Then pull out your sword! Remember, you can create anything you can imagine. That means the only limitations of this battle are the limitations of your very mind!
You nod, reaching out and summoning a sword. It looks like a sword. It’s pointy. And silver. And… big?
“I call this sword Pig Fucker… It fucks pigs.”
“…”
“…”
“I think we both understand why I’m the writer…” I sigh.
“…”
“Then, it is time to die! Brace yourself! Darkbringer, kill that Pig Fucker!” I swing down my sword.
“Ah! Pig Fucker! Save me!” You lift your sword to block.
The resulting explosion spreads throughout MSB as the universe that contains PoC shatters.
Don’t worry, I learned my lesson. If I don’t announce the chapters to you, you’ll just make comments about how I haven’t released anything :/
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I’m sitting here with a displeased look on my face. The entire courtyard is silent. All of the girls wait as the deadline for the ‘Save the Waifu’ competition strikes zero. After the magical clock that sat in the middle of the clock flashes zero for a minute and disappears, there is still nothing else that happens. I continue to just sit there, my palm on my cheek, and you continue to sit opposite of me. Nearby, your harem of girls anxiously await their fate.
“Well?” You finally ask.
“… you’ve saved them all.” I finally respond, my mouth twisting in disgust.
There is a cry of celebration amongst the girls. Some cheer, some burst into tears, and some clap each other on the back. Overall, the celebration continues for about ten minutes, but as I sit there doing nothing, the excitement starts to fade away. Soon, everyone is wondering what I plan next. However, I continue to just sit there, doing nothing. Eventually, all eyes, including yours, are back on me. I raise an eyebrow.
“Oh, I’m sorry, did you want something?” I ask.
“…” You shrug. “Shouldn’t we be getting this over with?”
“Hah? We did… I gave you a choice. This is the ending you wanted, isn’t it?”
“?”
“I won’t touch your girls. Congratulations. You’ve successfully paid me to not write ero in this ero novel!”
“!?”
“What did you think this was? I had an ending. It’d be exciting. It’d be triumphant. People would be affected. Some would grow. Some would never be the same. Some might even die. That’s the point of a good climax. Thinks can’t just remain the same… Unchanging safety, that’s boring. That’s mundane. That’s… what you unanimously seemed to ask for.” I lean back and sigh.
“So, here we are. A safe story. Nothing bad will happen to your girls. God forbid you feel anxious, excited, or the least bit worried in the finale of a story! But you didn’t want that. Collectively, readers, your words were loud, clear, and backed by cold, hard cash. You’d rather nothing happen so that you could feel relieved that everyone is safe. Congratulations. You have security. How does it feel? Was this the ending you wanted?”
“You know… NTR isn’t the only way to make a story exciting!” You defend. “Isn’t it your job as an author to make this story good? Isn’t it your own lack of creativity that makes you not come up with anything after NTR?” You demand.
“You want me to write an exciting climax… in an ero story, where an already established Demon God comes into the story to take all your women… and they can’t do that… and you still want it to be exciting and interesting?”
“…”
“Let’s just face the truth. You’re dickless. I said it already, I’ll say it again. You’re so scared of what I might do, you’ll actually rather pay me to do nothing. You’re selfish, and cowardly, and so terrified of losing… anything… that you desperately hold on to everything. Collectively, you couldn’t leave a single girl behind to continue the story. Some of this so-called harem are women you’ve never even had sex with. They were barely present for a chapter or two, but you’re so desperate to keep what’s yours, you couldn’t even sacrifice Experiment 626. She’s literally a sexdoll whose been being banged by goblins for months on end. You haven’t touched her once… but apparently she needed to be saved. Lillian… my own ex-wife… you banged once… and she needed to be saved? Presumably, I’ve had sex with her before, but god forbid you allow her to take one for the team.
“And the funny thing is, there are actually people who like NTR. You’re so selfish, you’re going to deprive them of getting their fetish… to save Lady? Cruella? Wendy? I could write a literal worm, call it your harem, and you’d give me a $1 for it, wouldn’t you?
“Hey, you made it seem like we needed to save all the girls from you!” You defend. “Save Your Waifu day, all of that rot!”
“Oh yes… I’m going to NOT encourage you to give me money. Welcome to planet doesn’t exist, where people don’t love to have you hand them a bunch of money at minimal effort.”
“…”
“Why don’t you just shut up!” A voice shot out from the crowd of girls, causing me to glance over in surprise.
“Ariel? Still giving lip?”
“You’re just upset that you’re little attempt to break up the readerbase didn’t work. They supported us! They love us! You’re just angry things didn’t go the way you want! Go take that money and buy yourself a pity dick to put in your mouth!”
“…” I glance over at Ariel with my eyes narrowed. “That’s actually an interesting point, how do your readers actually feel about you?”
“…”
“W-well I know Alex loves me!” Mulan calls out.
“Stuart loves me!” Aurora adds.
“Evyatar loves me!” Snow White snorts proudly.
“Love? They spent a few bucks on you. They’ll spend $50 on a hooker, it doesn’t mean there is any love there!” I shot back. “You know what? I’m done with this bullshit.”
I stand up, heading over to Ariel. She takes a step back, fear shining in her eyes.
“What are you doing?” You demand.
“I’m taking what is mine!” I snarl. “Ariel, I made you first. So, it’s fitting that we have a little fun. To start this orgy.”
“We paid you money!” You call out.
“You made a deal with a Demon God…” I laugh.
“…”
“Still don’t want to see my finale?” I chuckle. “Still want the mediocrity of a limp ending? Too bad, I’m going to reach this climax full cocked!”
“Ahh! St-stop!” Ariel cries as I grab her and pull her into my arms.
“Don’t worry, Ariel, I’ll write it so you love it much better than anything the MC would give you.”
“No, I don’t want it!” She cries out as my hands reach out and grab her chest.
I start ripping off her clothing, pawing at her naked body. My hands are rough and course, and cause erotic feelings to shoot through her body. Her eyes start to glaze over as my hands start to cause her arousal way better than the arousal you could give her. She is just my bitch after all. Not your bitch. My bitch. Woof for me, bitch.
“W-woof.”
Come, suck my dick. Lower you head. Get on your knees. That’s right, open those pretty little lips. Do you see? Do you see your Ariel loves me just the same. She’s such a slut. Aren’t you, Ariel?
“Yes… I’m Whizzer’s slut.” Ariel’s voice says.
Mmm… now suck my cock. Suck it, Ariel, Suck.
“Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!” A moment later, Ariel stands up and her foot slams right into my balls.
What? I didn’t write that? Why would I write myself getting kicked in the balls!
“Get away, you creep!” Ariel slaps my face and I collapse to the ground in pain as she runs over to your arms.
What? What? What? No. No. That’s not the way this story is going! What are you doing? Who’s doing this! Who’s fucking with my story!
.
.
.
.
.
.
“Maybe you’re secretly a cucked M?” You suggest.
“Oh, you can go to hell-“
“I wonder which of your women I’ll enjoy first? Will it be Belle? No one is willing to spare $3 to save you, girl…” I chuckle.
“I-impossible… beast, how could you let me suffer under this filthy man.” Belle struggles as I tie her up in magical restraints, which squeeze her so tightly she lets out a little gasp.
Her boobs nearly pop out the top of her dress, her curvaceous nature being further emphasized by my bindings. I walk up to Belle and move my lips right up to her cheek. She pulls away, a disgusted look on her face. Slowly, my tongue starts to part from my lips. Belle’s eyes widen as her head is slowly turned back to face me, her own mouth starts opening up to take my tongue. You can only watch, with a tiny-dicked erection, as Belle starts to give in to her lust for me.
“Or, on second thought…” I pull away just as my tongue avoids Belle’s mouth. “Cinderella is available as well.”
“Darling will come for me, naturally.” Cinderella explains.
“Really?” I snap my finger, and Cinderella’s dress explodes off of her, bearing her naked form.
Of course, I make it so that she can’t put her hands to cover herself. I role my finger in a circle, and Cinderella starts turning around with jerky movements. I bend my finger down, and Cinderella bends over, showing her beautiful behind. Your tiny dick shrivels, unable to handle the level of beauty of this hot little former ghost mistress. She reaches her hands back, spreading her cheeks, exposing her perfect pussy and ass, just for me. I unzip my pants.
“To think, just $3 would have prevented this…”
“You cheap bastard, how about you bully a real warrior!” Snow White calls out.
I turn to her and snicker. “You wouldn’t mean you, my little goblin queen?”
“Just unleash these restraints, and I’ll show you!”
“Mm… But I thought you liked restraints.” I laugh, moving up behind Snow White, my massive hard member pressing into her backside to the point that even she has to gasp.
“I made you to enjoy the voyeur. You like being shamed, don’t you?” I asked, grabbing Snow White’s chin and turning it toward you, sitting there with your sad pencil dick.
“Maybe… we should show the readers how much of an anal whore you truly can be! I don’t think I’ve tested out your ass nearly enough. My audience likes anal sex, maybe we can start with this hard rod in your tight, green hole.”
“Go to hell!” She cries out, her face yellow from rage as I rubbed my cheek against hers.
I pulled away as I noticed Tiana shivering. “Oh… poor Tiana… abandoned… no one put any money out for you either, huh? No worries… I can find lots of ways for Tiana to bring in money.
“!!! What are you saying?” Tiana demands in a flush.
I shrug, poking her with my fingers as I spoke. “Isn’t it obvious? I’m going to put… you… to… work…”
“B-bastard…”
“Ah… you say that now… but I wrote you… don’t think I don’t understand what excites you… See that, reader? She’s excited by the things I’m going to do to her in your place. She can work the streets for me, giving local men blowjobs for $1. For $5, any hole.”
“B-b-bastard…”
“Hey… the readers couldn’t spare $3… I got to make back the money somehow, sweetheart.”
“Haven’t you always been whoring us out?” Megara shot.
I look over at her, innocently frozen there, “Oh? My little self-aware girl has something to say?”
“You made us, right? You created all of us… but didn’t you just create us for the readers to jack off and give you money? In the end, didn’t you just whore us out for money!”
“Hehehe… that’s an interesting theory.” I shrug. “Maybe you all are just a bunch of whores. Maybe I should do away with all the formalities. I could delete those of you who aren’t saved. After all, aren’t you all just worthless. You bitches had one job, to earn papa a little dough, and for those of you who haven’t delivered, doesn’t that just make you… dead weight? Nala? Moana? Anna/Elsa? Fuck, won’t even save your own children? Cold… reader… cold…”
“Shove it, you manipulative man!” Wendy cries out.
I glance over at her and smirk,“ You, I actually see being left. But I wouldn’t NTR him with you.”
“Y-you wouldn’t?” Wendy asks nervously.
“No… I’d just get rid of you. I’d unmake you… poof.” I opened my hands and spread them to emphasize the point.
“What about your plan?” Lady cries out. “How does getting rid of us help you?”
I chuckle. “Come on, let’s face it, I may have gotten a little excited in the end there. I made way more sluts than I needed. Some of you barely have a personality at all, let alone any development.”
“…”
“You see, when this story is over, I’m still honor bound to hire the illustrator to draw the “better” images of each of you. That costs me $17 an image. No joke. So, you know, you can’t even earn me a buck or two? Gone. I’ll keep that money, thank you very much.”
“Haha… that’s a shame… if you fuck me, it’s the same as fucking his mom!” Cruella laughs in a last ditch effort to save herself.
“You think I need you to fuck his mom?” I roll my eyes, causing Cruella to shut up. “I can summon his mom as easily as saying it.”
Your mom is now giving your pencil dick a lapdance, grinding her shriveled old ass against you while wearing the Princess Leia slave outfit. Get that image out of your head.
“Haha… see? Wasn’t this fun? To think… $26 is all it’d take and all this horribleness goes away, but if it doesn’t happen by the end of tomorrow… say goodbye ladies. You are the weakest links. Does anyone get that reference? That’s so 2000s.” I let out laugh and jump in the air, pausing in freeze frame as upbeat music plays me out.
The Release schedule has been set to every Saturday. I will give bonus chapters in a week if I write more.
My apologies for delayed releases. I am busy saving my semester. It will take some time to get used to this hectic everyday life. I hope everything will turn out for the best.
Enjoy the Chapter! Thanks!
Alright, guys, I know all of you sort of learned how to provide basic communication since you were toddlers, but there seems to be a massive amount of people who think treating a content creator with basic respect when commenting or talking to them is too much. You get startled like a virgin who popped his first boner every time you find them not dolling you with politeness whenever you talk to them like an asshole.
I mean, I wouldn’t even mind it if it wasn’t so one sided. You comment to me like a dipshit and when I respond in kind, you get all upset like “Jeese, why’d he snap? I just made a rude comment and crapped all over his work, he didn’t have to make it personal.” Since trying to correct these poor behaviors has failed on an individual scale, the Great Demon God Whizzer has stepped off his mighty throne to provide you morons with a couple of pieces of advice on how to handle basic communication.
Example: “Did you know that you have a spelling error in this chapter?”
How the hell am I supposed to answer that? Yes! I did. So, why are you wasting my time reminding me of a thing I already know? Or better yet, if you find a spelling error, just tell me you think you found a spelling error. And do use “I think”, because 9/10 times, you’re wrong!
Example: “Hey, when is the next chapter of … coming out?”
I have a limited amount of time in my life, and every moment I spend answering your inane questions is a moment taken away from something else. Now… I’m assuming there are stories I write which you’d like to read. Would you rather be reading those stories… or reading me commenting to you for the tenth time about when those stories will come? If you don’t have a time, it’s because it hasn’t been announced yet, and for the most part, I give times. I mean, Hollywood can say a movie will come out in Spring of 2020 and you guy are cool for 12 months. I say my next volume will come out in two months and I need to be asked 8 times the exact fucking hour… no… I shit you not, people wanted me to give them release times on the fucking hour.
Example: “The password didn’t work on this chapter.”
I’m not your IT guy. I did write a nice little faq about what to do if your passwords don’t work and I have left them in “Trouble with Passwords” links freaking everywhere, but even with that I still get 3-4 of these comments a week. If I just posted it 20 seconds ago… there is a good chance I posted the wrong thing, and will in fact “correct” it within a few minutes. However, if that isn’t the case chances are, it’s a problem only you have, and maybe you should call the Geek Squad and stop wasting my time!
Example: “Um… the main characters name is Clyburn, but on paragraph five you wrote ‘Clybum jumped up the wall.’ There isn’t some kind of new character named Clybum who showed up for exactly one sentence, right?” -No shit, this is exactly how dumb some of these comments are.
I’m releasing these chapters often the same damn time I write them. I have no formal editor. I do better edits, and those end up in the pdfs which you are welcome to read… when they are done. You want the newest freshest right off the presses content… that means it’s not always the cleanest. Occasionally, there will be spelling mistakes, or worst, actual continuity errors.
Look, I am HAPPY to be referred to with mistakes, in particular when they change the meaning of a sentence. But when you phrase it in a way like you can’t even tell when an obvious spelling error is a spelling error, it just irritates the shit out of me.
Example: “Um… your release says you release on Tuesdays, and it’s Wednesday somewhere, so where the hell is the next chapter?”
I have made every single release I have promised on time, yet if you went through my PM feed you’d think I was constantly missing releases (by more than a couple of hours). You’d think I was the worst poster ever, despite having kept ridiculously constant with my schedule, despite being so vast. Yet, I did make a mistake. Sorry, I fell really ill the last week.
The last two chapters of WoW were up for the $5 tier on the 5th. They were supposed to unlock one on the 9th and one on the 12th. Yet, all I got was silence. This was the finale of the story where I have 150+ $1 donators… yet I didn’t get a single PM or DM that I can find in my history on discord, Patreon, or my website. (On that note, MSB isn’t my website. I can post on it, but I get NO indicator if you comment to me on MSB, so a comment on the last chapter is almost meaningless unless I go check, not the best way to communicate with me in a hurry.)
And you know what? There might have been some comment I missed, but I’ve received so many phony and bogus “demands” for more chapters that it likely got ignored. That’s what happens when you guys nag me for no reason. It means when you have a reason to actually nag me, not only are the people that need to say something silent, but the few who speak up get ignored.
Example: “Um… you asked in a poll last week how we’d feel if you took a break, so without any announcement on your end, I’m going to start acting like you already took that break.”
… Come on guys. Just use your brain five seconds before wasting my time with your brain noise. It’s not hard. If I haven’t announced something, it hasn’t been announced. Just because I talked about doing something doesn’t mean I agreed to do it. Just because I put out a oneshot doesn’t mean I’m picking up a series. Just because I’ve said I’m considering decreasing my work load doesn’t mean I’ve decreased it (I’ve probably put more time into the site in the last two weeks than I did the month prior, completely redesigning it, generating new images, etc… etc… not to mention the speed releasing of WoW, several oneshots, and a few bonus chapters I plan to release soon.) However, if you went by some of my conversations, you’d swear people thought I was on a beach jacking off.
However, it goes beyond that. Early release chapters are early released. Early released images are not finished yet. How about don’t nag me for content that isn’t finished, eh? You paid your dues to be able to see the hottest off the press stuff, and then you seem to grow indignant when it’s not as good as the final stuff? WTF?
So, yeah, I perfectly am happy with comments and feedback. I don’t know where this idea comes from that I’m unapproachable. I just don’t particularly like idiotic comments that waste everyone’s time. As a last point to be made, every single one of you seem to think every comment I make is targeted at you personally. It isn’t. I don’t know you, and there are too many of you to count. This isn’t about you.
If nothing I said applies to you, then this was not targeted at you and you have nothing to be offended about. However, if you find yourself “offended” by this, chances are, you’re an idiot who makes stupid comments… so… cut that shit out. Seriously.
Your Lord and Master,
Whizzer, Demon God