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“Fire!” You shout.

Pffftt…

“Glaaaaa…” Foam is dripping out of the side of Grimhilde’s mouth.

“Eeeeee…” Megara moans wordlessly in despair.

“Captain Hero! The Pussy Canons have dried up!” Ariel declares.

Your fists tighten on the wheel. “And to think, we were so close.”

“Actually, we got all of the little harpies. The remaining survivors ran away.” Ariel explains.

“Little harpies? What does that mean?”

Ariel points behind the ship, and you look to see one massive harpy left. You blink a few times as your eyes adjust to its size. It’s a massive naked woman. Calling her massive isn’t saying she’s like the giantess Kida. Rather, she’s even larger than Mushu or Mulan when they’re in dragon forms. Her tits, while only about the D’s on a regular woman, are about the size of the entire airship each. Your mouth falls open.

“That’s one big bitch!” You shout.

“Daaaaamnnn you… huuumaaaaans.” Her voice cries out, but it sounded like talking was not natural for her. “I KIIIILLLLL ALLL Huuumaaaans.”

“The harpy queen likely doesn’t have the same weaknesses as her spawn!” Ariel declares. “A little water won’t bring her down.

“Well, yeah, even if it knocks her to the ground, she’s barely flying as is!” You cry out.

Although the harpy queen has wings, they barely can get it off the ground. That’s to say it is flying fifty meters off the ground, but when you compare it to her over all size, if she suddenly lost flight the subsequent fall would be the equivalent of jumping down from a playground set, hardly a fall to the death. However, the harpy queen was a beautiful creature, just like all of her minions. Each flap of the wings caused the hill sized breasts to bounce up and down. The slapping of her tits as they came down her chest were sufficient to create a thunderous clap each time she flaps towards them.

“There is only one way this is going to end.” You sigh.

“Hero?” Ariel asks.

“I’m going to go fight it, and buy you all time to escape.”

“Fight? Isn’t that the wrong “f” word?” Ariel muses.

“…” You sigh. “Sometimes, I think you know me too well.”

Activating a flying spell, you take off from the side of the airship, heading toward the massive monster.

“Gigapenis, activate!” Your pants explode off of you as a massive thing appears in front of the harpy queen.

It stops racing forward, noticing a massive object blocking its path. It looks curiously down at it.

“Whaaaats daaaat?” The giant looks down at the massive thing jutting from your small flying form, so complete oversized that from a distance it just looks like a giant floating cock and balls.

“Your defeat!” You declare proudly.

You turn and spin, sending the cock into a side sweep as the harpy bends over to examine your junk. It hits the side of the harpy’s face with a clap. Although the harpy is the size of a small mountain, the dick comparatively is still larger. This is a dick that fucks planets. It’s still the length of the Harpies arm and as thick as half of her head. Being struck by that hard-massive thing immediately knocked the lights out of the already barely sentient monster queen.

It falls to the ground, stumbles and then trips over a small hill. As luck would have it, it lands on its knees, with its butt up in the air. The harpy immediately tries to bring itself back up, pushing with its arms. Before it can do so, you charge penis first. Your gigadick impales her, remarkably sliding into the path of least resistance, her giant pussy! As a siren-like species that depends on seducing humans and other monsters, harvesting their cum for babies, and then eating the rest… this massive harpy is as built for sex as all the little ones.

Although the vaginal hole isn’t a real sex organ for the harpy, the harpy naturally evolved to take the phallus of a large variety of monsters. Despite their small bodies, a harpy could survive bring impaled by a giant’s cock. The inside womb being replaced with a massive gooey pouch that can expand up to their chest and tighten at will. Unlike your other girls, this is a bitch that can take even the gigadick! You let out a moan as it slides all the way in. To your shock, you find yourself only a few meters away from a massive gaping maw surrounded by pussy lips, currently filled with your dick. Had the harpy queen just been a little larger, you might have ended up going inside!

The sensation of 99.999% of your body mass being squeezed inside this tight pussy is indescribable. It is completely unlike the skyhole, which only was only a tight ring or pressure that ran up and down your gigadick. Of course, with the dick shoved into the harpy down to her chest, it also served to pin her down to the ground.

“Naaaaa….. sooooo ffuuuuulll” The harpy lets out an orgasmic cry, enjoying the filling of having it’s vaginal pouch filled to the brim, the stretching feeling being an experience harpies rarely feel with their universal pussies.

Still, harpy’s have pussies designed to please the male fucking them. In a normal feeding, a harpy would swoop down while the entranced male whips out his dick. She mounts him and gives him intense pleasure before biting and eating him alive while still fucking him. If she was lucky, he’d cum, which would result in her cocooning and forming more creatures.

However, you had knocked this big bitch over with your cock before sliding it from behind. This was a disadvantageous position for the harpy queen. With her face shoved into the ground, she had no choice but to take it as you used your whole body to slide in and out of her. Naturally, as a flying little person at the end of a massive gigapenis, this is performed magically and you don’t feel any discomfort. From Ariel’s distance, it only looks like a giant winged harpy bent over a hill moaning as a disembodied massive dick pounds her cunnie.

“Ahhnnn… gooooooddd….. c-c-cuummmmming!”

Harpy lust bursts forth from the pussy lips as your dick pounds in roughly. You stop short of going the last few meters, letting out a breath of relief. Only a few feet in front of you is essentially a waterfall of gooey pussy juice. If the pussy canons smelled pungent before, this smelled like dunking your head in a barrel of sex! Had this harpy queen been more of a squirter, you might have been washed away by the torrent of lady cum. You narrowly avoided become drenched in pussy!

“I’m cumming!” You declare, reaching your limit in the given situation.

“Yyeeeeesss…. Ccuuuuum!” The beast howls.

Of course, you have no intention of impregnating a queen and making more queens. Harpy’s grew by fucking and eating humanoid creatures. If they got the seed, they’d cocoon and multiply. Then, they would eat again. Basically, as they grew bigger and bigger, there drive to procreate would increase. They’d be less inclined to eat and more inclined to fuck. So young harpies might eat a victim only a few seconds into the sex process, giving the man no time to cum, while a full developed harpy might go for ten minutes before eating, hopefully given the helpless man time to deliver her seed before she eats him and cocoons. A harpy queen forms when a harpy never manages to get a man to cum.

Basically, this harpy had a series of bad luck, fucking men who were afraid or cum shy, and thus it ate without ever going through a division. As it grew, it became too scary for men to want to mate with it, and eventually, it got too big to mate entirely. Thus, this queen harpy grew out of eating countless wayward travelers, while never getting to procreate like the other harpys. As to how long it took to get that size and how many men it had to eat, that’d be anyone’s guess. At its current size, however, if it did cocoon, it’s offshoots would undoubtedly already be large enough to be considered queens of their own right.

Of course, you consider this into your calculations, and come inside the creature anyway. The harpy queen moans orgasmically as it feels itself being filled with man-cum for the first time in its many years of life. Finally, this queen would fulfill its duty and be able to procreate. This was the happiest day of its life. You keep pumping it full of cum, the creature waiting to cocoon once you stop filling it up. A bright smile glistens its face, and you have to avoid another torrent of pussy waterfall.

You’d been listening to your own women orgasm for the last six hours without doing anything, so you have a lot of built up stress. This almost mindless queen is just the ticket. The last time your gigapenis came, it created a tsunami large enough to create its own spinoff franchise. Of course, you limited the amount of cum this time, but even 1/100^th that amount would be more than a single creature could contain.

With your dick as the cork, you kept cumming and cumming. The queen roars and squirms as more and more hot sticky white stuff is pumped into it. It’s pouch which could store literally tons of cum quickly filled to the brim. The more cum inside it, the more pleasure it felt. With this much cum, it could divide 100 times, no, a thousand times. In the blink of an eye, the entire army you painfully destroyed could be renewed by this single queen. Still, more cum raced forth. Your cock injects it so deeply and blocks the only exit, so the cum has no place to escape. Soon, the harpy queen starts to swell up, the cum exceeding the capacity of the pouch. Cum starts to leak out its mouth, its ears, its eyes.

It’d be a gruesome sight, except the harpy feels no pain, only the most wonderful pleasure it has ever felt in its life. Harpies are designed to feel pleasure upon contact with semen, and the more semen, the more pleasure. with the amount pumped into this poor creature, she was feeling an orgasm a hundred thousand times more powerful than anything her sisters got to feel. Even if death immediately followed, the nearly mindless creature didn’t care, it was in perpetual bliss.

“Aiiiiiii…. Thhhhhheeeeeee beeeeeeestttt…. Iiiii Looooovvveee smmmmaaaaaalllll huuuummmaaan!”

Just as it manages to get that out, the overflow capacity is reached and broken. The harpy explodes in a violent eruption like a popped balloon. From the airship, as Ariel unstraps all the shivering and partially unconscious women, she sees a giant white mushroom cloud. A few moments later, something warm splashes on her cheek. She reaches up and touches it, it’s white sticky stuff she is very familiar with. More of it starts falling down until it turns into a downpour.

Naturally, it is cum. The cumfall rains down for about thirty minutes until if finally stops. By the time it’s done, as far as the eye could reach looks like it has been covered in foam or perhaps snow. You inadvertently impregnated ten women in nearby villages during the subsequent cumstorms, but you wouldn’t learn about those baby mommas until much later.

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“Nyaaa!” The last harpy falls from the sky while making an erotic victory sign, its face covered in white spooge and a grin on its face.

Ariel runs to you on the deck, only slipping two or three times on the various cum piles that have covered the entire ship. It looks like winter, except the white stuff isn’t snow.

“There are even more of them coming from behind!” She warns.

“Damn it!” You curse, “They just keep coming! Will it never end?”

Grimhilde, who had been pouting below with the other demon lords for the last three hours during this battle finally made her way on deck. She carefully avoided the cum as she made her way over with her dress up in her hands, although her eyes were saying that she wanted to leap into the cum and make cumangels. There was no ending her addiction now.

“My love, you’re fighting… harpies?” Grimhilde’s eyes flash. “Don’t tell me you’ve been using your sperm, have you?”

“Yeah, well, the girls didn’t want to use the milk?” You sigh.

Grimhilde shook her head in agitation. “No, no… that’s not it. Harpies are a really strange creature! They’re sirens of the air, but the way they reproduce is by… coming in contact with male seed.”

“Say what now?”

“Their skin absorbs cum! They use that to become pregnant! That’s why they make erotic sounds when you shoot them. You’ve been giving them an all they can eat breeding frenzy!”

“B-but they fall!” You gasp. “I’ve been impregnating and murdering pregnant harpies!”

“No, hero, as soon as they become pregnant, they go into a cocooned state. By the time they reach the ground, they’re already incased in a protective barrier. After about 30 minutes, the casing breaks open, and five or six new harpies emerge! Please, hero, tell me! How many harpies have you blasted with your cum?”

“Oh… I don’t know…” You count on your fingers. “50-60…”

Grimhilde breathes in relief. “Oh, that’s not too bad.”

“Thousand…”

“What!? Did you say 50,000?”

“Well, they keep coming!”

“That’s because so do you!” Grimhilde cries out, “We’re doomed! That’s like a quarter million harpies! Do you know what they’ll do? Even with their obvious weakness they could wipe out half the world!”

“So… you’re saying don’t cum on them…”

“My love! You’re very cute some of the time and with all this cum around me I feel like I’m floating in heaven, but please take this seriously!”

“The only other liquid we have is milk…” You sigh.

“Then use the damn milk!”

“Hey, criminal, we’re out of milk!” Moana shouts. “A dirty Jasmine needed extra cleaning, Geheheheh…”

“You, stop touching my little sister that way, you creep!” Elena shouts followed by a slapping sound.

“Hey, you don’t understand, I’m pro-tiny!”

“That’s the problem!”

You ignore the fighting coming from the door and turn back to Grimhilde. “No milk.”

Grimhilde sniffs. “Well, you’re going to have to come up with something.”

You lower your head with a nod of acceptance. “I understand. Grimhilde, I’m going to need your help. You… and all the other girls.”

Grimhilde grins. “Finally, you put trust in us demon lords. It’s about time.”

A few moments later.

“Ahhhh! You bastard! This isn’t what I had in mind!” Grimhilde screams from the side of the ship.

“This is so naughty!” Medusa muses. “I could never be so lustful as to think of this.”

“Release this great one! She can’t stand for this humiliation.” Mulan cries.

“As expected of Warrior… hah hah hah…” Snow White has a dirty look on her face. “Turning even battle into a way to embarrass me.”

“If this is what is required to fight, I will do my best as Rookie commands.” Kida mutters, but her eyes are closed and she seems to be trying to abandon her brain.

There is a low buzzing noise sounding out throughout the ship. Along the sides of the ship are each woman, laid out over the edge like you had once taken Tiana, except it isn’t their head hanging off the edge, but their pussy. Their bodies are in contraptions that looks a bit like human-sized crossbow without the string, their legs are tied up and spread into V’s, baring their pussies to the outside of the ship.

There also appears to be an apparatus on their pussies, a small thing touches their clit, vibrating vigorously, while a dildo on a hinge is ramming them erotically. In essence, over twenty harem girls are strapped along the sides of the ship with their pussies lined up like canons. This is the ultimate in aerial warfare, the newly designed pussy canon!

Only two girls have been spared. The first is Jasmine, who has been regulated to drink duty. She runs around, giving the girls water to drink. You, of course, are able to summon some glasses of water to keep your women hydrated. You aren’t cruel, after all. As to why you didn’t just summon water to wash out the harpy menace. That’s a good question with a very logical answer.

The second girl who was spared is actually Ariel, who is standing…

“You’re seriously not going to explain it!” Mulan cries out.

Ariel is standing by you. In front of her is some kind of computerized control panel. You’re showing her how to use it.

“Sigh… they’re really not…” Grimhilde reserved herself for being used as a pussy canon, at least when this was all over she could lick the deck clean to cheer herself up.

“Oh… what’s this button do?” Ariel touches a button.

“Aiiiii!” Nala screams out, a second later a burst of squirted lust shoots out fifty feet from the ship, a spray of it being caught in the wind like seamist or a dolphin blow while the rest falls harmlessly down.

You nod. “The girls are all hooked up to devices that stimulate them sexually. Using a technique I developed, they are denied orgasms until you flip the switch. Then, all their sexual lust comes out at once and they shoot. Of course, I’ve amplified the effect with magic several times, so they’re squirting is top notch.”

“Ooo… can I be strapped to one?” Ariel asks excitedly.

“Maybe later, for now, I need you to man the canons. You’re going to be fighting off the harpies. You got to launch just as a harpy comes nearby. The girls don’t have my surefire aim, so when they pop, it’s more like a shotgun blast with lady mist, so you should be able to hit any harpy within fifty meters. Remember that once you shoot a pussy canon, it’s gonna take her a few minutes to recover. I’ve sped things up again, so these bitches will be squirting like crazy, but try not to overuse any pussy.”

“Yes, hero…” Ariel nods excitedly.

“Alright, first mate Ariel, are you ready to make two dozen women squirt buckets?” You ask.

Ariel salutes. “Yes, Captain Hero! I was born for this!”

“I’ll take the helm, fire on my mark!”

You leap behind the wheel and start turning he ship, readying to head back into the countless waves of harpies approaching.

“P-prince… please… you don’t have to do this, this is crazy!” Ursula shouts out in one last desperate attempt.

“Sorry, no time to back out now!” You spin the wheel turning the ship just as a wave of harpies descend.

The shot is perfect, ten some pussies aimed at about fifteen attacking naked women, you mean harpies.

“First mate Ariel! Fire the pussy canons, Starboard side!”

“Ahhhhh!”

“Mmmmm… oooo. Fuck!

“It’s coming out!”

“Ah, I can’t hold it in!”

“C-c-c-cummming!”

A moment later, ten vaginas erupt in a spray of pussy juice. It smacks into the harpies like a wave. Instead of making cute moaning noises, they howl in anguish as they collapse from the sky, likely falling to their deaths for real this time. A musky feminine scent fills the air, female mist drifting over the ship like gunsmoke. You hear gasping and moaning as the ten women set off recover.

“Good!” You shout, seeing the first wave defeated. “Only 250,000 to go!”

Twenty-four women start to weep.

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Anyone curious, WoW Chapter 28 is unlocked. 29 and 30 unlock Wednesday and Friday, as originally planned.

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Bam! Bam!

Two harpies got sprayed in the face, causing them to suddenly plummet down to the Earth below. “Nnnnaaaa!!!”

“Do-do they have to make those moaning noises when they get hit?”  Elena asks, blushing.

“There is another, five o clock!” Ariel calls out, pointing, very enthusiastically aiding you.

You aim your dick in that direction. A harpy just manages to jump onto the deck. With a blast of force, white stuff strikes the harpy. As white stuff rolls down its smooth luscious skin, it lets out a moan. Its hands grab its nipples and twists them. You crank up the force, shooting another wad of baby batter. This time, it’s enough force to knock the harpy off the side of the ship. It moans orgasmically as it plummets to its death.

“Why do they twist their nipples, doesn’t that hurt?” Jasmine asks, walking up from the lower deck.

“J-Jasmine! Wh-what are you doing out here?” Elena cries.

“Eh? Everyone is making a commotion. I wanted to show Savior my swimsuit, what do you think?”

Jasmine is wearing a single piece navy blue swimsuit which had a white bar on the front. As to where she found this thing, no one could guess, but it was the titular example of a Japanese school swim suit. With her twitching cat ears and swishing tail, she looked the picture of innocence. The weabo Megara and the tiny-con Moana are naturally the most affected.

“So-so cute!” Megara cries.

“I want to eat her up!” Moana adds.

However, Jasmine ignores them and is more focused on you and the commotion at the front of the ship. “What’s savior have in his hand? He seems to be aiming it at naked women and white stuff is coming out. I want to see! What’s going?”

“No!” Elena, Aurora, Merida all shout at the same time, racing to block her view.

“Why are you guys blocking! I want to look! They’re making funny noises. What are they doing? What is savior doing? Why are they twisting their nipples?”

“I don’t know!” Elena cries, trying to cover Jasmine’s eyes. “They must enjoy pain! Never let anyone touch your nipples.”

“I-it doesn’t always hurt…” Merida suddenly speaks up, before blushing. “If you touch them the right way.”

“Eh?” Elena declares. “It always hurts. Nipples aren’t meant to be pulled and twisted like that!”

Aurora gives a small smile. “Well, it can hurt, but it can feel really good too. H-has hero-san not given you nipples attention?”

“What? No… nipples? He’s never touched them, if they really felt good, why would he-“ Elena’s eyes suddenly fall flatly on Merida and Aurora’s chests, losing their light. “Oh…”

“What’s going on? Does savior play with nipples too? Come on, let me see!” Jasmine was still struggling as the other women blocked her vision.

“I-it’s probably just a coincidence…” Aurora looks away innocently.

“M-maybe it doesn’t feel good if you don’t have big boobs?” Merida ponders.

Elena looks back and forth between the two women teary eyed before glaring at you, still taking pot shots at harpies. “Sweetheart! Wh-why have you never played with my nipples!”

“Eh, what?” You turn, but just as you turn you forget to turn off the hose.

“Ahhh!”

“Ehhh!’

“Daddy!”

As you turn, a spray of white rockets across the ship and slams into three unsuspecting women. By the time you think to shut off the drip, there are three cum-drenched woman standing there with white stuff dripping down their bodies. It was a rather impressive load for a shot fifty feet away.

“You-you!” Aurora glares, her dignity completely soiled by her soiled body.

“Daddy…” Merida lifts up her hand, white stuff dripping everywhere she tries to wipe.

“I’m all dirty…” Elena cries tearfully.

“Wh-what’s this?” Jasmine asks.

It was then that the three women split, a forth girl is on the floor. The little cat girl in her bathing suit is covered from head to toe in white stuff. She is looking at some white stuff on the back of her hand. She raises it up to her face and sniffs, then she stickd her tongue out to lick it like a cat licking it’s paw.

“No!” Everyone shouts at once.

“H-h-hero-san! What have you done?” Aurora accuses.

All the women turned to you, your dick still hanging out an on display for the little girl covered in white.

“I… have no excuse.” You look down.

Moana walks up hesitantly. “I… you’re the father of my children. I knew you’re a criminal, but I failed to arrest you. In a way, I’m as guilty as you are.”

Since Moana became pregnant, her feelings towards your tiny ways were more tolerant, and this was her attempt to comfort you.

“That’s… not helping…” You sigh.

“I don’t get it? What’s wrong? Why is the mood so heavy?” Jasmine asks, “Oo… it’s gushy and warm… hehehe.”

Jasmine splashes innocently in the white stuff.

“She’s so innocent! It’s adorable!” Megara cries.

“To think… hero-san would do that to her…” Merida couldn’t bear to look any longer.

“Wait! We can work with this!” You declare. “She doesn’t know, so her innocence as been maintained! Quick, Moana take her back down and clean her off!”

Moana’s eyes turn to stars. “With pleasure!”

“Jasmine!”

“Eh? Savior?” Jasmine snaps to attention.

“You just got hit with magical unicorn cream from the… eh… magical land of um… spooge! I’m using the unicorn cream to fight the evil… naked… um… sluts. You must wash it off you immediately or you may end up turning into a slut yourself. Only sluts get the cream! And It’s coming from my crotch because… um… I shoot from the hip?”

Jasmine’s eyes brighten. “Re-really? Savior is saving us again! I certainly won’t become no slut!”

Everyone let’s out a breath of relief as Jasmine stands and pumps her hand, unbelievably accepting your blatant lies with the blind innocence of a child. You turn back away, wiping the cold sweat from your face as you start to fight the next wave of harpies. Meanwhile, Moana takes Jasmine away to wash her in milk, the only available cleaning solution, even if it felt like fighting fire with fire. The other girls follow behind, also needing a milk bath.

“You guys all know I’ve walked in on you all having sex hundreds of times. I’ve lost my innocence a long time ago and am just waiting for him to take my virginity. I’m well aware I saw Savior’s penis and now I’m covered in his semen, right?” Jasmine suddenly mentions out of the blue, tapping her lip. “Now that I’ve received a cumshot, I wonder how long until he just fucks me already?”

“…”

It turned out it wasn’t Jasmine who was being naïve… but everyone else.

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You pull up a telescope and glance through it to observe the objects in the distance. The enemies appear to be coming closer.

“What do you see, hero?” Ariel asks anxiously.

“Tits.” You respond.

“Eh?” Aurora speaks up. “Is the euphemism for something?”

“Tits is tits! I see tits! Boobies. Hooters, Bouncy Bongos!” You declare.

“My lord isn’t being facetious.” Mushu pipped in, “My dragon sight can see them, winged female beasts are approaching from the rear.”

“Beasts?” You mutter, “They look like hot naked bitches with wings? Why are they our enemy? I say I give them a greeting with my penis.”

Mushu gives a wry smile. “I wouldn’t recommend that, My lord, these beasts are a monster known as a harpy!”

“A harpy!” Merida cries out. “I’ve never fought a harpy before. Are they as dangerous as the people say?”

“Harpies? Aren’t they the ugly horned girls with disturbing tits? These women all look hot and perfectly fuckable,” You mutter.

“You don’t get it, daddy, that’s how these beasts work. They look like angels, but they’re really devils. Men struggle to fight or attack them. Some even try to capture or violate them… that’s when the harpy’s swarm and kill. There outer appearance is a rouse there to get you into a false sense of security. They’re basically the sirens of the sky.”

“Plus, their boobs are fake.” Mulan adds, landing and returning to her human form.

“What are you doing back here? We’re still being chased!” You demand.

“Ah! Master, this great one tried, but the Harpy’s are impervious to fire!”

“Useless!”

“Oh… well why don’t you ask STEVE to fight them?” Mulan shouts back.

“Who?” You give Mulan a confused look.

“What, Steve? Wore an eyepatch. Had three children. Died tragically?” Mulan growls.

“I legitimately have no clue what you’re talking about right now.” You shake your head before turning to the girl next to you. “Ariel?”

“I think Mulan must have been struck with some mind magic.”

“#&!*!&^!”

“Mushu! Take Mulan below and treat her illness.”

“Yes, my lord, I’ll take her below and rape her repeatedly.” Mushu bows.

“What! That’s not what he commanded at all.” Mulan cries out.

“Poor girl.” Mushu looks teary eyed. “Her mind is such a mess. This will require additional rapings until her mind improves.”

“Stop! Master! You’re hearing this right? This one’s not crazy! Stop touching that! Save me!” The door slams, cutting off Mulan’s desperate cries.

You shake your head. “Well, the dragons are out, what else we got?”

“Daddy, these harpy’s are nefarious. They’re not particularly strong, but they’re tenacious. They are almost invulnerable to all attacks.”

“Every attack!” Your eyes widen.

“Every one!”

“Even piercing?”

“Yes.”

“Thrusting?”

“Yes.”

“Pounding?”

“Aren’t you just saying the same thing!?”

“What about penetration?”

“Daddy! Be serious! The only thing that can harm a harpy is water.”

“Eh? Water, is that it?”

“Yes, if the harpies get any liquid on them, they lose the ability to fly and will go crashing down. It’s the easiest way to stop them!”

“Very well, let’s bring out the water. It’s time to hose these hoes.”

“Unfortunately, hero-san, we didn’t pack any water.” Aurora shrugged.

“What? How do we quench our thirst then?”

“Well, we have barrels of milk.”

“Milk? Then… I guess we’ll have to use-“

“No! Hero, you can’t… if you take our milk, how will we take milkbaths?” Ariel asks tearfully. “What about the milk wrestling I had planned later? How will the little ones like Jasmine, Mulan, and Maleficant grow big boobs if they aren’t given their milk injection? Think of the boobs, won’t someone think of the boobs?”

Your hand tightens for a second and you look away as emotion overtakes you while listening to Ariel’s heartfelt pleas, causing you to release a single tear down your cheek. “Damn it, Ariel… you’re right, we can’t waste that milk. Shit… then how do we defeat these harpy bitches?”

“We’d need some kind of source of liquid, hopefully using a mechanism that ejects it at a high speed!” Aurora explains. “But whoever was handling such a weapon, they’d need to be one hell of an aim. They’re wicked fast, young, virgin, and quite frisky.”

You nod, understanding what you must do. This is your moment. You’ve been in another world for three months now, and it’s all been building up to this final confrontation. Thousands of naked winged women are flying toward your ship. Your harem is completely at risk. It’s up to you now to win the day. You pull out your weapon.

“Turn the ship around! Sail into them dead on. I will smite these bitches with my weapon!”

“It’s his penis… he’s talking about his penis!” Ariel explains.

“Shhh… we know, daughter!” Aurora strokes her daughter’s head, who smiles excitedly.

“Hello, ladies…” You declare, standing on the bow of the airship. “I’m cumming for you.”

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“Ah… this has been a very peaceful journey…” Mulan sighs, leaning back in a fold out recliner that you have no clue where she got.

“Damn it, Mulan!” You curse. “Don’t you know when you say that, you’re setting off a flag?”

“A f-flag! What’s a flag?”

“It’s a flag, Mulan!” Megara interrupts angrily. “It’s like when you say things are fine, it’s a sign things are going to shit!”

“She’s right…” an old man suddenly came out from the deck below. “These airs be a dangerous place to be spreading flags, arrrr….”

He had a wood leg, a beard, and a scar across his eye, covered with an eyepatch. He stomped up near Megara and Mulan cautiously.

“Who the hell is this guy?” Mulan asks.

“You don’t know Steve?” I ask, “Steve’s been with us since the beginning!”

“You’re screwing with me, right!”

“It’s okay… I get that a lot… arrr….” Steve looks disappointed that Mulan doesn’t seem to recognize him.

“What’s happening up here?” Mushu asks.

“Mulan doesn’t know Steve…” you explain.

“Mulan! You don’t know Steve? But Steve’s a great guy!”

“Arrr… thank you Ms. Mushu… I try to be a kind gentlemen.” He takes off his hat and blushes while scratching his straggly beard.

“Hey, guys, I heard Steve’s up here!” Ariel bounces out of a cabin. “Oh, Steve! I wanted to talk to you about some private matters!”

“Wha—ah— I can’t even…” Mulan lowers her head in a pout as everyone shoots Steve affectionate looks.

“Before he goes, Wh-what do you mean?” Megara takes the bait. “I mean, about it being a dangerous place.”

“Arrr…. I feel it in my bones. The area we’re flying now, it be dangerous. We be sailing over Pony Mountain.”

“Well that doesn’t sound so bad…”

“Well, don’t let the name fool ya, not every dangerous peak be named Death Mountain.”

“Naturally…”

“It just leaves me feeling worried.” Steve continued. “At least, I take solace in the fact that I’m one week away from retirement.”

“Oh, you didn’t mention that!” Ariel says eagerly. “We should throw Steve a party!”

“Yeah! Let’s do that!” the girls all agree excitedly.

“Seriously, who is this guy?” Mulan cries.

“Arrrr… thank you kindly. Could I invite my wife and children? I don’t get to see them very often and my wife’s been sick lately.”

“How are the family anyway?” You ask.

“Ah, the little one says he wants to be just like his old man when he grows up and my daughter is growing into a real beauty. My wife is pregnant too, even though she’s been ill. I hope to be home before he’s born so I can tell him how much I like living.”

“Uh… guys… isn’t this one of those flags you’re talking about?” Mulan asks.

“Quiet, Mulan, you don’t even know Steve!” You admonish the dragon. “Anyway, I’m glad to hear your wife is pregnant. A family of four, that’s got to be pricey.”

“Arr… you said it, I struggle to feed them every day. However, my wife runs the orphanage, so we cut back to donate to the starving orphans, naturally we make due with less so they can have something as well.”

“Ah… Steve, that’s so sweet.” Ariel smiles.

“You know, since I’m paying you, I guess I could give your retirement pension a raise.” You nod.

“Oh! Bless you sir! I could really use it! This will mean my family can live a better life. As long as I don’t suddenly die, I’m sure I can provide for my family for years to come. Of course, if I died now, they’d certainly fall into destitution. My wife might even be forced to sell her body for ends meet. It’d be horrible. Man, I love living.”

“Guys… I’m getting a bad feeling here…”

“Well, it’s a good thing you’re so spry and healthy.”

“Of course! Now, if you all don’t mind, I found a kitten that snuck aboard without its mother. I’d like to offer it a portion of my milk supply. Although I have osteoporosis, and could use the calcium, this old man’s heart would break if that kitten was left to starve.”

“Oh, well, good luck, Steve!” You wave as Steve limps away, moving precariously near the edge of the ship.

“Seriously, guys, am I the only one who sees this?” Mulan demands.

“Damn it, Mulan. What is your problem with Steve? That man is a national treasure.” You wipe a tear from your eye. “He taught me everything I know. Besides, this ship is well protected. No harm could possibly come to anyone on it! I mean, I don’t mean to brag, and maybe I was a little tight on the lifeboats, but I’ll go down as say this ship is unsinkab-“

“Guh!”

Everyone turns to see Steve standing there, an arrow pierced though his chest. He looks over at you as blood drips out of his mouth.

“I’ll… be fine… sir…”

Three more arrows hit him in rapid succession. Then Steve turns and falls off the edge of the ship.

“No! Steeeeeve! I really liked that guy!” you cry, running over to the edge of the ship.

“Not Steve!” Ariel cries, following you with the other girls in tow.

“Wait, can’t you just turn back time and bring him back!” Mulan asks.

“Shhh!” You put a finger over her mouth. “It’s too soon…”

“What does that even mean?”

“Stop, Mulan. He would have wanted it this way…” Mushu cries, turning away tearfully.

“What? Wasn’t he just talking about how much he wanted to live?”

“It’s because you don’t know Steve like we do!” Even Ariel snapped, before turning and crying on your shoulder.

Every one gives the clueless Mulan who can’t read the situation dark looks until she puts down her head and feels like crying herself.

“I’m just going to go hide in my room…” Mulan whines.

“No time! We’re under attack. Go, man the defenses!” You point to the bow of the ship.

“Everyone, we must fight… for STEVE!”

“For Steve!”

“Mother Fuc-“ the last part of her sentence is lost as she leaps off the ship and turns into a dragon, her words ending in a roar.

Immediately, she opens her mouth and a cone of fire covering the entire side of the ship bursts forth towards your enemies.

“Wow… she really did care about Steve after all.” Ariel watches wonderingly while the other girls nod.

Had Mulan heard this, naturally she would have been spitting blood, not fire.

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